“your feathers are now to big” - ‘too’ big.

I liked the theme of mothering/protecting that you showed in this. I got the sense that the narrator wanted to be all things to the subject - mother, lover, child.

I also liked the metaphor of the baby bird. It makes me think that you, and the subject are young (and I‘m pretty sure you are, and that‘s not a bad thing) but you have all of the awkward eloquence of youth in this, how simply complicated, and complicatedly simple love at first sight is. Keep up the good work.

Much love,

Juliet.

Jules, via the Review Marathon (link in my profile)

wow, this is absolutely amazing! i love it. it's so sad and beautiful at the same time.

"And like the bird I found this morning, I'll lay you down in a bucket of begonias." First, I think it's only fair to tell you that this line absolutely emotionally devastated me. Second, not many writers can successfully begin a poem with the word 'and,' but you, my dear, did and excellent job. Third, the imagery here is heart-stopping - there's something about 'bird' imagery that really moves me. I loved this poem. :D

Amazing piece, great metaphor!

Nice job :)

aw... lost baby birds make me so sad. a very small one died on my towel in spain once. I cried buckets.

anyway, nice metaphor, very simple and quaint. like it a lot.

Aw, that's s'pretty... It's so sad, too. It makes we want to cry. :( but... I love the feeling in this, and the last line is wonderfully mysterious.

Live, laugh, love.

Alphabetical Dreams