Reviews for Cloak and Dagger |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Loved this story through and through. The majority of Stockholm stories irritate me with the idiotic way most girls just roll over and play dead, falling irrevocably in love without a fight, but you did this very tastefully and illustrated well the relationship that would more realistically exist in a Stockholm's. Also quite interesting/well done that you had her miscarry, as opposed to using the child as an excuse to write a sequel (which I am eagerly anticipating). Incredibly well written through and 't wait to read more of your work! |
![]() ![]() Wow. No offense, but the ending wasn't even an ending. It was a cliff hanger/unfinished scene. How lame. You really do suck at writing endings. -_- Nice story though, but crap ending. Rushed ending, too, due to the extra chapter you added. |
![]() ![]() ![]() (*ahem* 'scuse my spelling. I sick) Wow, I remember reading Jaded and that was awesome. But this was... FANTASTICALLY AWESOME. You nailed it. NAILED IT. *repeat 50x in a sing-song voice of happiness* Oh, ye gods, Michael is the most cuddly assassin EVER. As cuddly as a double-edged knife can get, any way. He totally loves her. I am convinced of this. He is so whipped - just done. Oh, lovely. I'm sure Christina loves him deep down, somewhere in there. I adore her character too, something that usually doesn't happen with female characters for me. But she's pretty awesome - I believe I would be like her in the situation, except more sarcastic (cause it's part of me, like my pinky or kidney). I believe a happy-esque ending will come to them. I hope one or both of them doesn't kick it - that's pretty typical these days, so typical it's predictable and annoying - 'cause I feel that if any couple could make it work out, it would be them. I personally think Michael is romantic, in a weird kind of way. What I'm saying is that I really enjoyed this. Thanks. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Well, that was certainly a ride. [: I actually liked the ending. It was a twist that, for once, I totally was not expecting. I didn't even think of the possibility of her being pregnant because the first time they had sex there was this big thing about him going to get a condom, and after that I just forgot that they needed one. Anyway, I really enjoyed this. Although I do wonder what would have happened if she hadn't miscarried. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Well the start is pretty interesting because some of the stories dont start with someone like Michael interviewing some hacker or thug etc. |
![]() ![]() THIS STORY DESERVES A THOUSAND REVIEWS. |
![]() ![]() your reviews are so close to a thousand.. so i thought id comment again :P |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really enjoyed the introduction to Christina. She's clever, that much is obvious, and she's human. You didn't make her a priss, but she also isn't one of those completely irritatingly preppy girls. She's a pragmatist, and that makes her both interesting and likable. I do have a question, and hopefully you're not so bored by my prattle that you miss it, but what nationality is Christina? You never actually say, and though it doesn't really matter, I'm trying to build a picture of her in my head. I'm wondering if she's Hispanic, if only because later on, she prays in Spanish (unless she's Catholic and that was Latin, and my own Spanish is so crap that I can't even tell the difference). I'm just wondering. "They had told me that the plane was leaving early that morning. Had they postponed the trip? If so, why? Last week, they had seemed quite anxious to leave." So basically, her parents knew something was wrong a WEEK in advance, stuck around themselves, and still left their daughter to the wolves? Did it honestly not occur to them that she would also be a target? They're either stupid or very, very selfish. I think I sort of hate them. Oh, now I'm wondering what happened to her kitten when she disappeared. I mean, her parents weren't around either. Poor kitty! And if Christina has a cell phone, why would her mother leave a note telling her to call immediately rather than just calling her daughter herself? I'm not going with the "stupid" half of "stupid or selfish." Really enjoyed the suspense in this scene, knowing he's coming for her and she's just stupidly sitting there. Very intense. "He pulled out an eye mask he'd gotten free from the airline and carefully adjusted it over her face." Nice use of free material, and nice use of details, candid. Well done. "Michael hoisted the girl into the backseat of his black sedan, which he had prepared specially for the occasion: he had jammed the locking mechanisms on each of the passenger doors and replaced all of the windows with bulletproof glass. Not that he expected gunfire, but one could never be too careful." How the heck do you replace the windows like that, even if you do know where to get bullet proof glass? Michael officially scares me. And wonderful idea to end the chapter with the song lyrics. Another nice touch in a sea of nice touches. You are fantastic! |
![]() ![]() ![]() So I'd thought that life had only interfered with my ability to review back around chapter nine or ten...and instead I'm finding that I either never reviewed at all or fp is letting me review everything all over again. Either way, I'm happy with an excuse to read the entire story once more. Heaven knows I ought to have it memorized by now, but it's a bit like reading a favorite book over and over again-it never gets old, and I find something new each time. I'm very pleased. I just hope you don't mind a long review...poor you. Don't feel that you have to read or even any of it! I do like how you started this version, though. (1.) Honor). I mean, really, we're talking about a guy we already know doesn't really have any (or at least not any easily found). It's a slightly misleading beginning, and I loved it. People who aren't familiar with Michael are probably going to be expecting the cliched rough-on-the-outside-but-gold-on-the-inside kind of guy, and they're in for a shock. Very well done, and all with a single word! I love you. "Sometimes they did work for the government; usually not." (About the IMA) Nicely done. I really do love how you can use just a word or two and send such a powerful message. This spoke volumes. "“Honor is worth more than blood money,” the man said." This from a hacker? I wonder if Michael found the contrast as amusing as I did? Or maybe "amusing" isn't quite a word that EVER applies to Michael... Have I mentioned how much I love his character? I can't remember quite what the beginning of the other version of this story was like-wasn't Christina the first character we met?-but however it started, I'm really enjoying this. You've already set Michael up as a contradiction-he isn't afraid to call in Callahan to torture the guy, but he wouldn't go that far himself. He's cold without being hopeless. Amazing how you've done this without having to point any of it out! It's always almost as much fun to read between the lines of this story as it is to read the actual lines, and I think this is why your story will never get old. Well done! |
![]() ![]() ![]() now that i read back, i reckon you would probably have been better off finishing the story here. it may be more depressing, but i think it just feels more.. right |
![]() ![]() ![]() an AWESOME story. loved the action. loved it. it wasn't a huge cliché where the girl falls instantly for the mysterious guy and they confess at the most 'romantic' time right before everything comes crashing down on them. i reckon you did well with the unconventional not-quite-happily-ever-after ending. most people would probably have given the characters an unrealistic ending. I agree with michael that life's not a fairytale. that was really good. This story really stood out for me. loved the action too. I'm not sure if a sequel would do the story that much good. i know i WANT a sequel to see what happens, but also i DON'T want a sequel because you might feel compelled to finish it with a happy ending that's too far from reality. I don't know... maybe i'm just a bit too morbid. But, don't mind me. Do whatever you think suits your story :) By the way, I believe you're a Twilight fan? Edward Collins? Olympic Peninsula? Seattle? Oregon? I sigh at you xD. JACOB FTW |
![]() ![]() ![]() the story is a good piece..it really is, however the ending would have been better if it didn't seemed chopped off..I do hope that the sequel would come out soon!:D I sure am reading it! thanks for sharing this beautiful piece! Edward Collins! LOL! |
![]() ![]() ![]() oh wow. this was amazing. beyond amazing. it had everything: a like/loveable protaganist, a (very) hot guy for said protaganist, wonderful writing that made it believable & not a sucks-ass ending :) im just wondering when you think the sequel will be up? (sorry if you're sick of this question). i look forward to it :) |
![]() ![]() ![]() "Cloak and Dagger" is amazing, I could picture everything as if from movie, from beginning to end. In fact, this story would be awesome on the big screen! I love the characters, your writing style (one word: wow), the plot, the action (AWESOME!), the realistically-paced romance… well, heck, everything! I am definitely looking forward to the sequel, this would just be incomplete without it! :P Good luck! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Loved this story and I really really hope there is a sequel! |