|Reviews for Shades of Grey|
| Kara Mia chapter 1 . 9/10/2009
I loved the way this flowed. My favorite line was: "...falling,
You captured the essence of your subject perfectly. It was really good. :-)
| Isca chapter 1 . 9/10/2009
"Everything is shades of grey." I like this line because I can relate to it.
"I plan to end my pain today." This is a very angsty line. :)
"Now I'm falling." Powerful. Wow.
"Nobody is ever weeping. Except for willows." Lovely. :D
| LostInMe chapter 1 . 9/8/2009
Very well done! I really like it! The meter you chose is extremely catchy - even though the poem is angsty, it's still important to be enjoyable to read.
"Life is ending
Death is calling
Nice effect, and I love the words.
Now, for some constructive criticism:
"I plan to end my pain today" - Drop a syllable here.
"Except for willows" - Same case. Suggestion: EXCEPT can be changed to BUT or SAVE.
"Goodbye…that’s all I have to say." Again, there's an extra syllable.
Apart from those three lines, everything was perfect. Whether you choose to change them or not, I still love the poem.
| steffxnie chapter 1 . 9/6/2009
Good flow, the words you used are simple and straight to the point. The 'falling...' bit has a nice effect, and it's nicely done.
'Except for willows
Head on pillows
Now I’m fading into grey'
I like this part!
Sorry, I can't write good reviews. D:
Anyways, great poem. Well done!
| SoneAnna chapter 1 . 9/5/2009
I must say I LOVE the rhyme scheme you used in this. It makes it flow in such a lovely manner, despite the theme of the poem itself.
The last couple of stanzas...wow that was sad. But I guess that's the point of depression. I also loved the way you conveyed such a common and over occouring indcident you hear these days in such a meaningful manner.
~Sone, from the Review Marathon (link in my profile)