|Reviews for Now Or Never|
| skyward squidly squee chapter 1 . 9/27/2009
Hm. I don't really like how each line is a full sentence; the flow's a little rough. Also, the first line sounds incorrect, and the word choice for the first line in the last stanza probably isn't the best. Another thing is, if i'm correctly guessing what this is about, the fact that no reasoning is shown behind it added to the fact that there isn't much detail otherwise.. just doesn't work very well.
I do like the vagueness throughout, in a way. When I imagine vagueness as a thing I think of the blur you see in action pictures, and that's what this poem kind of felt like, mainly in the drop.
By the end I'm a little unsure of what happened, and then I think, "Um, yeah. That was it." And anyways, if you're dead the messages you leave aren't expected to be very clear. (Ah, my enjoyment of morbid humor has only been increased by Buffy..)
- giant squid.
The Review Game, Poems: Easy Fix
| Black Sparrow chapter 1 . 9/27/2009
:S down she goes.
That was really good. The repetition worked well. I loved it. Keep up the writing.