|Reviews for we are depleted|
| no.peace.los.angeles chapter 1 . 12/6/2009
Very nice, vivid imagery in this. I especially love the last line. It does feel a bit disjointed, in that I can't really feel a sense of continuity or a story, per se, in the poem itself, but I like the images, so it works. Keep writing! :)
| Written chapter 1 . 10/26/2009
you changed your name!
loved this piece.
1. your imagery, as always, is fantastic. the dusty ness, the almost arid feel of everything, the paper, the ash, and the cobwebs. this is a very visual poem but it's also... um... almost something you can smell, with the musty, dusty... ness.
2. poems about writing are automatic love-it.
| magictampon chapter 1 . 10/25/2009
I just realized that I think I still haven't reviewed any of your stuff. So here I am!
Your poetry is lovely. You have grand imagery and juxtaposition, and over all I just love this.
I wish I understood poetry, but I don't. I do enjoy it, regardless. ;)
And I am getting to responding to your PM, but I've been busy so I'll probably get to it tonight.
| we must reinvent love chapter 1 . 9/27/2009
i enjoyed this piece most of all.
the imagery made me read over again, and the whole poem turned into a moving picture.
| in theory chapter 1 . 9/27/2009
I love how you personified the "basement" of your memories. I've always seen imagination as a kind of attic, so this stuck out instantly. Really pretty.
| tonight we bloom chapter 1 . 9/25/2009
Definitely the best of all your pieces, I'd say.
I don't even know where to begin, it's just... amazing.
| VELVETxKISSES chapter 1 . 9/25/2009
Wow! I really really really like the first stanza. I love the descriptions! Keep up the good work!
| Isca chapter 1 . 9/25/2009
"Bled black." Nice 'bl' alliteration. The 'bl' sound repetition has a nice 'oozing' quality to it. ;)
"Musty yellow." Vivid colour description.
"The corners of my mind." Fascinating.
"Spiderwebs dangle from my creaking, shuttered eyes; floorboards groan in the basement of my memories." This is definitely my favourite part of the poem. Spiderwebs, shuttered eyes, groaning floorboards...I can't take much more...It's stunning and soul-wrenching! :D
"The air is stale." What a powerful line!
"My ashes fall like snow." The tone of this simile is wonderfully melancholic.