|Reviews for Event Horizon|
| Mreeb chapter 9 . 1/6/2010
I actually read this on new years eve, but got distracted by the new years-y activities going down at my house and didn't review. So, this will probably be remarkably unhelpful since my initial thoughts are no longer initial thoughts. My apologies.
I like Grace. She's got sass, but not so much that she's one of those annoying overly sassy chicks with Sue-like tendencies. It's the good, right amount of sass.
Oh, Niamh. Oh, highly perceptive, possibly psychic, occsionally struggling with vocabulary, shiny Niamh. I wonder how much she really knows about what's going on - does she know more than she lets on? Hmm...
I like how Iolyn and Virgil's relationship is developing. It's cute, kind of brotherly. And also entertaining. Poor Virgil, though. Third wheeling is the worst.
| CaveDwellers chapter 9 . 1/4/2010
Ah, Grace. If only you knew.
"Virgil got the feeling that he had somehow annoyed Grace."
No, really? What gave you that idea? XD Boys.
I think he's going to regret blowing her off so often.
I think I'd be apprehensive, too. Playing Creator just isn't easy-so many things to think about...
"The left wing on this butterfly insisted on being misshapen. It was so frustrating."
Oh, yeah! And then when you erase and re-draw the part that's bothering you things seem to come out exactly the same!
Why is Iolyn asking about Virgil's older brother? I can't figure it out right now.
Niamh is so innocent and happy and naive that you can't get mad at her, but a part of me keeps thinking that she needs a healthy dose of reality to show her that nothing is always sunny and perfect, too. Ignorance IS bliss, though...
I dunno. I've personally got mixed feelings about her character right now. Not quite sure why.
"The only difference was that Niamh wasn't quite so talented at telling when he was doing it."
;P That's an understatement.
Poor Virgil. I think we can all agree that being the [unrequited] third wheel just stinks.
Great chapter. Can't wait to see the next one!
| CaveDwellers chapter 8 . 12/26/2009
Ooh, sneaking out Pheobe-what a naughty girl.
She and Micah are totally getting married one day. That's my prediction ;P
"But then there would be something about the way Phoebe was acting and bam. Grounded for life."
Yep, that's pretty much how it works. It's an instantaneous thing.
"Maybe it was because the state was shaped like a mitten."
That could be it. I'd think so, comin' from Hawaii and all.
*muffled snickers* Yeah. Like your mother, that's how much it hurt. XD I love it.
Yeah, stinking boys and their body heat!
I actually have a lot of that, too, but I think that's because I'm not a tiny girl.
Oh, I sprint across streets where there's a lot of time to get across, too. I think everybody should.
At least Britney Spears wouldn't molest you. She's made a great comeback in the eyes of the media, actually. That's hard to do. I'd definitely pick Britney.
Wait, it's 2005. Um... no, I think I'd still pick her. I just wouldn't talk to her.
"Dear Flord, if he was any more excited about this, he might wet himself."
Oh dear, let's hope he doesn't do that. And just because I'm uneducated, who is Flord? Is it something Iolyn made up or something that actually exists?
Just a question: was Iolyn's thought process the one you went through when making the different races in WWID? Sounds like a writer's imagination at work.
If I had the ability to create stuff, I'd totally jump out of my front window to do it.
Or I would just sit and type on my computer. Whichever.
Oh yeah. Pheobe and Micah are totally going to get married.
""Moose Tracks. Only way to go."
I beg to differ. Nothing is as good as classic o' vanilla.
""Um... a cute kid like you have a girlfriend? Or are you just a flirt?" She wasn't afraid to go there."
Oh man, I think I'd wet myself if I had to go there. I'd pull a Sim, or a Daniel.
Again, I maintain that they're gonna be married some day. They fit too well together.
Oh, it's great how Niamh gives personalities to everything. Talking to the ocean... I think that should be the title of something someday. Yepyep
Oh, and Iolyn knows it's alive, too. That's great.
The romantic in me is saying that he's falling for Niamh. Hard. Poor Virgil. Being third wheel stinks. I am glad they all get along, though.
They're thinking too much about it, methinks. That's why it's not working. Or they're just coming up with excuses to. Yeah, maybe it's that.
Wow Pheobe, what a tease.
"...She took my gum..."
I totally cracked up at that one. Poor Micah.
| CaveDwellers chapter 7 . 12/26/2009
Sorry this is so late. ""
Oh, I love that I'm Cold And Drinking Warm Liquid feeling. Energizing.
Inherently. Erroneously. Very nice words, Niamh.
"“Their purpose can be to do good. I mean… that’s what this world will be, right? Inherently good. And they can keep the world pure and…”"
Wait. I thought the meaning of life was 42!
Iolyn's idea for the Writer, the Artist, and the Light is repeated in his thoughts, and then again in speech. It felt sort of redundant. Just a personal opinion, though.
"He glanced upwards, praying that God wouldn’t smite them."
I bet God thinks this is mighty entertaining, personally. Little do they know about what they're getting into...
""You believed yourself into being a human," said Iolyn in a deadpan voice. "Seriously.""
1) You can just say he deadpanned. That's perfectly acceptable, too. 2) Oh c'mon, why not? I like the idea!
Wow, see what believing can do to a person?
"Even the boys had to admit that the logic was so flawed that they couldn't argue with it."
I love it. And from the perspective of WWID, it's a wonderful way to make the year.
I dunno, Iolyn, I'd say it was a pretty darn productive day, personally.
| Mreeb chapter 8 . 12/8/2009
Yay! New chapter! Ok, first off, Micah and Phoebe are adorable. And I really like that their first (*cough* 10 *cough*) kiss(es) were awkward because it made them seem really real. First kisses are not always perfect – in fact, they are frequently the opposite, so that was good. On that note, the “she took my gum” line was a hilarious way to end the chapter. On that note (the sequel!): "Stupid boys and their stupid body heat. She wanted some of that." *smirk* I bet she does.
"...if he was any more excited about this, he might wet himself." Me too, Iolyn. Me too. This is indeed getting way cool, but in a very worrying “oh crap, look at all these powerful creatures he wants to make that they could lose control of and all sorts of other bad stuff could happen!” way that I am quite enjoying. Oh, the anticipation of things to come!
I think ‘pyrokinetic’ actually is a word...Microsoft Word disagrees with me, though...
I laughed at the line about hitting on homophobes because a friend of mine (a very flamboyantly gay friend of mine) totally does that for kicks all the time and it’s hilarious.
“one of those nights that was just begging for teenagers to jump out their bedroom windows and create stuff.” I liked that line for some reason. It made me happy – maybe ‘cause it is bizarre out of context and therefore amusing, but also maybe because it is a little true. There are nights that are inspirational and just beg for creating, even if it isn’t in the same kind of creating Iolyn wants to do.
I loved getting the story from the perspective of each character involved in this chapter. It was neat! Also, it made for really smooth transitions between the two parallel stories. Oh! I also liked the fact that these stories paralleled each other! It was well done, the way these two instances were told at the same time, switching back and forth, in a way that made the parallels clear. It was cute, and further implied what had been hinted at before (that Niamh will be a romantic interest for Iolyn). So awesome job there.
Keep up the great work!
| Mreeb chapter 7 . 11/30/2009
Whoot, more coolness! I see some interesting moral dilemas popping up with these kids playing God. How exciting! Seriously, I'm pumped to see how those are dealt with, and what consequences will be suffered for them and such. I like the three different perspectives on creating, too, with Niamh having no issues with it, Iolyn being a little aprehensive but okay so long as they do it "right" (for lack of a better word), and Virgil being very aprehensive about it. Like I said: coolness.
Again, Niamh is adorable and awesome. Again the sequel, it is super cool that she believed herself into existence. I am very pumped, by the way, to see her grow. And get creepy! I like creepy...Anyways, I think that's all I have to say this time around. Still loving it, and still very excited for more!
GOOD LUCK! Write on, you crazy creator, you! I hope you don't get caffeine poisoning. :P
| lovefantasyworkreality chapter 2 . 11/28/2009
I GET IT NOW!
| CaveDwellers chapter 6 . 11/27/2009
Just got through writing the most painful chapter of my life, so this is my reward.
I thought Iolyn trying to convince himself about the creepy door just being an innocent old creepy door was pretty darn amusing.
Hahaha! I suspected this, but Virgil and Iolyn meeting like that is hilarious.
Ooh, blushing/chemistry/ooh la la. Poor Virgil. It sucks being the third wheel/one of the wheel's tutor in the English language.
"...scenery, which required the ground."
oh, good point. ;P
I feel plot coming on. Literally (oh, I do crack myself up). Looking forward to the next chapter.
| Mreeb chapter 6 . 11/26/2009
OMIGOD the boy is Iolyn! WOAH! It was Iolyn, not random boy who died! Unless ... Iolyn ... eventually will be the random boy who died? OH NO! Okay, I am crazy theorizing, but I think my head just sploded and I am excited (because my head sploded? what? something's not right with that...). But that would explain why present!Virgil recognized Iolyn and looked all...unhappy and...I don't know. 'Cause past!Virgil is going to find out what happens to him! Or not. I'm just really hyper right now, and for some reason that inspires crazy theorizing...I apologize if this is the most incoherent review ever...
Okay, more awesomeness, more head explosions, and a FEW more answers that made a million more questions. Loving it! There is a lot of fantastic mystery here, and it makes me ridiculously excited to learn more. I loved seeing these three characters meet up; Virgil and Iolyn have a great character dynamic that I am excited to see more of, and Niamh is so very adorable! I love her! I especially liked the image you put in my head of her singing to herself in the background while the two boys fought. Beautiful!
They are creating their own world? THAT IS SO FREAKIN' AWESOME!
Pumped to read the second part of this chapter!
| CaveDwellers chapter 5 . 11/13/2009
Okay, so this will probably be short but if I don't review now I don't think I'll ever get my lazy butt back around to it.
Virgil sounds like a normal kid-muahahha. Wait 'til all that changes.
Door frame of glowing vines. Tasteful.
I love Niamh's foreignness. She's so funny.
Speaking of which, I was actually joking about the "No, I wasn't born yesterday, I was born last week" thing just before I read it. Great minds must think alike or something, 'cause that was just way too perfect to be coincidence.
Looking forward to the weirdness to come, I am. Bring it on! :D
| CaveDwellers chapter 4 . 11/13/2009
Sorry this is so delayed. I've been selfishly absorbed in preparing for the three days I won't be able to meet my quota this month, due to an off-island trip.
I didn't realize Iolyn's family was Jewish. Interesting.
"Ha, Christianity was like Judaism's rebelling teenage child, in a way."
It is. Just like the USA is the rebellious problem child of England (and the world, in some cases, but we all think that America is so darn cool so we never punish it).
Ah, Micah. Poor kid. I would have laughed at his Jell-o comment.
Wow, Pheobe was being mean.
Oh, never mind. I get it now. She's playing hard to get. How cute. ;P
I was watching that TV show Roseanne the other day, and one of the ladies at this fancy party was saying "Oh yes, I love that girl. She's the perfect poster child for New York-2 pounds above organ failure"
I thought it was great. Pheobe's inner monologue about how she's supposed to hate the way she looks reminded be of it.
Oh yeah, they are smitten.
"...you have another think coming."
Yeah. I think you might notice why I'm bringing this up.
Secret Window. Never saw it, but I had my friend tell me all about it (it's how I know my movies). It definitely sounds like it could be a scary movie, if you were in that mind set.
If I were Phoebe I'd probably be skeptical, too, but being a reader I realize that it's probably true, just because stories work like that.
Oh, nice. I'm going to try and read the next chapter now, if I can squeeze it in before school.
| Mreeb chapter 5 . 11/12/2009
Well, I was just about to go to bed, but then a new chapter appeared! So quickly after I requested, too. It makes me feel special (because there is definitely no possible way that could be a coincidence at all...nope...).
Niamh NEEV? 0.o Look at this - even the names are intriguing! I'm not even sure how that pronunciation works.
Ha! Grace and Virgil only friends. Silly boy. In other news, Niamh is adorable. I liked that she had trouble remembering words. I also like the line about being hurt so much that you stop moving forever (that sentence came out creepier than I intended...). It was like *shiver*, and yet naive and innocent in an endearingly sweet way at the same time.
Boy he's never seen before? Like, boy who randomly died boy? Possibly? ! Super excited for the continuation!
Oh, and don't worry about having not replied. NaNo and school are allowed to come first. ;) Also, I love mozzarella sticks, so thanks for those.
| Mreeb chapter 4 . 11/12/2009
Ok, I know, I said it already, but DAMN this story is interesting! I mean, seriously. I want to know more!
So, this chapter made me like Phoebe a whole lot more. Yay to getting to see new sides of her! I giggled a lot. This was really cute. The banter between Micah and Phoebe when he was trying to tell her the story was a lot of fun, and I muchly enjoyed it. And giggled pretty much continuously. Did I mention that?
Hmm, Virgil, we meet again! So. Very. Curious!
Again, broken record, awesome job!
Write more please. :D *folds hands into lap and waits semi-patiently*
| Mreeb chapter 3 . 11/12/2009
That made me laugh, too. But you know what line made me laugh the most? "Phoebe was a menace." For some reason, that really tickled me. Best segue EVER.
Still interested. Still excited. Still have nothing for you to improve on. I'm not very helpful, am I?
Here, I'll tell you what I like! I really love your writing style. You break the fourth wall to talk to your readers, but rather than that being jarring or breaking my suspension of belief, it makes this feel like it is a story someone is telling me before bed, or over a cup of coffee (albeit, a really exciting and intense cup of coffee) or something. I don't think that's a thing people commonly pull off with this amount of success. The narration has character, and therefore the story has character, which gives it an awesomely unique tone that is really fun. I feel like I'm involved here! Things like adding "No, really" to the descriptions, as though you sensed that I might not believe you when you tell me that crazy Tinker Bell light is moving, are not only fun and make me giggle a little but also make me feel as though this is not just a story you are telling me over an intense cup of coffee. No - this is a TRUE story you are telling me over an intense cup of coffee. So, instead of destroying my suspension of belief, you have somehow magically ENHANCED it. How did you do that? That's crazy!
Another thing I love is how quickly your characters come to life (something I found true in WWID as well). Two chapters and a prologue in, and I already can relate to each character, find them believable, and care about them. Really well done! Keep up the awesome work!
| Mreeb chapter 2 . 11/11/2009
Omigod, how did it manage to just get exponentially more interesting with just one chapter when it was already insanely interesting to begin with? You are the master. I swear. I feel a story alert subscription coming on!
So, my thoughts as I was reading were as follows: "Oh, hey, her name's Phoebe! I bet this is the story Virgil was writing, cool! Oh look, more Virgil. Oh, back to his story and - whoa, wait, what? The house - is it Virgil's? Is that - are they - is this - ARE THEY GONNA MEET? HOLY CRAP, THEY ARE! THEY'RE MEETING! WOAH!" And then I freaked out for awhile. Like, I almost fell off my bed. Virgil totally knows what's gonna happen to Iolyn! AH!
Basically, I am loving it so far! Again, nothing I can see to change. You have shown me once more that you are insanely good at hooking readers right from the get go. Fantastic job!