Reviews for Skiagraphia draft
my-perversities chapter 21 . 2/23/2017
I really really loved this story. It is a great concept and well written. I can't believe you even created another language! It was new and exciting and completely different from anything I've read before. And I always adore a giant warrior race!

There were a couple things I'd like to point out to hopefully help with the editing process. I would recommend having Alan describe his appearance in the very beginning as I didn't realize he was blond with brown eye until the second book.

There were also a couple things that were not explained really well like Martin makes an offhand comment that Alan's eyes are yellow but it doesn't explain why, how, when it happened or if it is just a metaphor for something else. The same happened when you advised Alan's blond hair all of the sudden had the bangs turn black. That's a great idea but it could do with more explanation: was it because he took in so much oen that it changed his body to show it? And before they went to meet the oenclar army Alan called his mom and said it was coming up to thanksgiving and yes he'd be home but then he came back and it was Christmas and no one was freaking out about not being able to reach him or why he didn't come home for thanksgiving.

It was very sad when Keyd's father died. Keyd was just getting to know him and reconciling. It did further the plot though. I really liked his character. He really loved his son and fully accepted him. It was sad that Keyd didn't get to really experience that for long.

I would have also liked the sex scenes to be more... nitty and gritty (I love details). ;) They got more detailed in the final book which was great but it would have been appreciated all through :p

I think the language you made is ingenious. It brought more to the story really made you feel like you were there. However I would recommend putting a translation beside each. You did a lot in the beginning but then it tapered off. I realize that only what Alan understands is translated, but there were quite a few times he did understand or even get the just of a concept and as a reader I was wondering what they were talking about. Even some of the terms and phrases you used constantly I forgot what they were (like Keyd calling Alan lanos).

I hope this didn't come off negative as I really enjoyed this story. I read it right through and stayed up really late for days on end (then went to work XD) because I was so enchanted. I just thought it may help with your rewrite to know some of the things I noticed.

I wish you all the best of luck in publishing. And I will keep an eye out for more because I'd really like to see Alan and Keyd's wedding. Also, how Darban and Kir are and if Darban fully healed. I would like to see Ryssa happy with her man and maybe even Ryhet and Ansa get with people. Even Occir's wedding and Eleon find someone or get Chris back.

Thank you for such a wonderful adventure.
Pagan chapter 21 . 11/19/2016
WOW. This is a great series, and I wish you success with publishing. You and these characters deserve it.
atenea-in-the-sky chapter 21 . 6/17/2016
OHHHH I utterly loved this epilogue! I can't believe the story is over :( I kinda feel like when I finished reading the Deathly Hallows, like "and now, what?". I just can't get over how much I love your characters. Seriously, I love all of your stories. I should actually go and sign up on Patreon (or whatever it is required) and actually start paying you for this XD. Which makes me think, are you on Scribd?

Anyway, I really hope to see more of your writing, either here or on paper. Girl, I would totally buy any book you publish, you're an amazing writer. Thanks for sharing your stories.

Best of luck!
chris bw chapter 21 . 4/10/2016
i love how you ended this on a good note. This was a read that i could not stop. All the way from the very 1st book. I love this story.

Thank You!
cinogenic chapter 21 . 4/4/2016
I just wanted to tell you that I loved this book so much. I binge read the last 10 chapters this week, and it kind of hit me that I've been reading this series for years. Since eighth grade. And for a while, I kinda fell off the face of the internet and got really behind, but kept up with PSoG...

I digress. Here I am finishing a series that has literally helped shape my youth, not to sound too weird. I just wanted to let you know how amazing this series has been, how amazing it's been to read all of your work. It steered me in the direction of writing, myself. I always loved to write but you as an author really inspired be and I pined after your style for a long time. I totally wanted to be a writer like you when I was younger... Still kinda do, but less "like you" and more like me.

The writing aside, I don't know, but I really just took to the genre and LGBT theme of your work as well, and that has meant a lot to me and moved me over the years, too. So I guess I wanted to say thanks. For writing such a great novel, a great series, and for giving me one of my favorite set of books I've read to date.

So sorry for such a weird comment/review, but I'm just glad I got to read this. You are by far one of my favorite authors. Thank you. Someday I will write a novel and I hope that maybe you'll stumble across it.

Qui chapter 21 . 3/22/2016

Long-time lurker-style reader here! Well, I may have commented in the past, but not recently. Anyway, I just felt that I should leave a review, because I've been alongside you for nearly all of the series-not the very very beginning, no, but somewhere back in the original version of the first story I believe. But basically I've been trailing behind you happily for a long time. And I've loved every word of the series, too. The twists of the plot, the depths and strengths (and weaknesses) of the characters, the careful world-building. This is a wonderful series here, and I'm so glad that you shared it with the world.

I wish you luck with Patreon and the rewrites, and I just ask that you remember to post everywhere when you finally do get them published, so avid freeloaders like myself can finally pay up (I'm going to use "publishing" as my excuse for why I haven't read the rewrites yet...).

Thank you once again for making such a beautiful story,
Sanguineus chapter 21 . 3/16/2016
A sweet end to this series! I love it. Once again thank you for sharing your stories
Originally Pristine chapter 21 . 3/15/2016
If you're going to publish the series, is there any way that you could have it done in print? c: I want to have your works on paper so I could have it on my book shelf! (But also because I hate e-books, and would rather avoid them if possible. LOL.)

But anyway, this was such a wonderful experience! You have no idea how thankful I am that you updated regularly especially since a whole lot of other slash stories tend to be permanently unfinished. Because of this, I never had a doubt in my mind that you would accomplish this series you set out to create.

I think I started reading the series when you started writing Nocturne. At first, I was having doubts about starting a story that seemed so impossibly long, but I'm so glad that I had went ahead and started the series anyway. It was so definitely worth it.

I will have to say, though, and I'm being brutally honest here, I probably won't be reading stories that include the Tenebrism universe, but in someone else's point of view. It's too weird for me. It's the same reason why I never read the sequels to Ender's Game or Every Day and also why I had trouble getting through The Heroes of Olympus. Point of view change in the same universe—I just can't.

Well, at any rate, thanks, Alyn Drasil, for writing one of the best series on Fictionpress. :) I'll still be lurking on your profile every once in a while to see when you've published.

Good luck!
Bridget Carson chapter 21 . 3/15/2016
Thank you so much for this story. I enjoyed the previous stories years ago and had hoped you'd eventually add to Skiagraphia. And then you did and it has a nice resolution to it. I hope you do get to publish it soon and have lots and lots of paying readers for it. Because really, you getting paid would hopefully mean inching your way to fulltime writing (if you want) which would mean more stories for us.
Nyasia A. Maire chapter 21 . 3/14/2016
Thank you for sharing with everyone here. Will you continue sharing the new Light and Shadow world stories here or will they be Patreon only? If so, I'll have to find a way to fit it into my budget. I can probably figure out a way to do it, but giving my CC number to Patreon makes me really nervous. Sigh...

Anyway, thank you again and again and again.
Nyasia A. Maire chapter 20 . 3/13/2016
It was a long time coming, but well worth it. I'm looking forward to the Epilogue because there are still unanswered questions. But, then again, life is the true never-ending story.

Thank you for sharing Alan, Keyd, Rysa and company with us. I will miss looking forward to your next chapter in the series. I think I've been following these stories for 7 or 8 years and I have to tell you, this is hands down, the best series I've read here. It truly deserves to be brought to a broader market.

Thank you again!
Sanguineus chapter 20 . 3/7/2016
Fictionpress was down for me for some time and I half-missed an alert but I've read this now It's been quite a journey since the first version of Tenebrism posted. I love your stories and your writing. I'm glad there's still an epilogue to go because my heart is not ready for the end yet. Thanks for sharing this wonderful, amazing story and world. The effort and work you did was great and rather inspiring.
I truly wish you the best 3
Nyasia A. Maire chapter 19 . 2/29/2016
Argh! I wish I were rich. Oh heck, I wish I was reasonably comfortable and then I could afford to donate to you on Patreon. But...wishing does not make it so, but I keep trying.

I know that the rest of this chapter is up on Patreon and I'm trying to be patient and wait for it here. I keep looking at the balance in my checking account and keep reminding myself of the $500 auto repair bill I'm going to have to pay and that stops me from donating at Patreon.

I can do this. I can wait. I've been here since the beginning.

Atenea217 chapter 19 . 2/26/2016
I'm too overwhelmed to login right now... But... OMG YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME! WHAT'S HAPPENING? WHAT WHAT WHAAAT?
All right, calm now... Surely he won't die... Surely? Nahh you won't do that to us, crazy fans who live a gazillion miles from you?, ptfff of course you won't.
That being said, I think I haven't left a review in a while, which is really ungreatful from me, since I totally love this story.
And I must be spelling terribly right now, but oh well, I'm kinda freezing right now so I can't think clearly.

Anyway, this chapter was really exiting! I loved it!
Pomperepozza chapter 19 . 2/23/2016
I'll repeat Keyd's words to you "Don't"! Oh, my... Happy thoughts, happy thoughts!
This is a really good chapter. Things are really comming to their conclusion. I can't believe this is almost at an end and I look forward to the last posts to see how everything unfolds.
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