Reviews for Prosetry
Moony08 chapter 1 . 7/8/2010
Hi!

This poem is cooler than the others - I like the Colour and Shade thing, izz cooll!

Anyways, you should check out my poems too.

Moony08, penname.

But great job!
in theory chapter 1 . 2/3/2010
Although, to be honest, I failed to see how this is 'prosetry' and not just freeverse poetry, I did feel completely immersed. Whatever the technical term for the rhythm is, it works. Unless I'm missing the point and prosetry IS freeverse? It does have a lyrical feel too. My only criticism is the emboldened line, as you give no instruction on how this is to be read aloud I kinda stumbled, it seemed to jar the fluidity quite badly.

Jack
andsherose chapter 1 . 1/20/2010
I have terribly mixed feeling about this poem.

On one hand, I do love stream of conscious pieces and I adore deep metaphor, both of which seem to have been implemented within this piece.

However, the stream-of-conscious quality was overused, in my opinion. It sounds forced; not beautifully insane, but just plain. It provides a rather strange hint that there might be nothing behind the metaphors, that this poem is a string of words jumbled together just because it sounds nice and not because there's meaning behind each line.

For example:

we are

the Color and the Shade.

Alone we are unseen-unspoken (I LOVE THIS STANZA UP TO THIS LINE, by the way).

and we fade,

together.

It's almost as if the poet was preparing the audience for a stark comparison but failed to deliver.

Anyway, I do love the form and the use of visual poetry. Well done on that account. I also love the use of contrasting and complementary words. (ie., color/shade, unseen/unspoken, normal/unique).

So we are now like a song[(;)
lookingwest chapter 1 . 1/19/2010
"If I am blue..."-favorite stanza.

This wonderful and bluewitness hopefully feels very smug about this being written for her, haha. I love the way it's also very meta-fiction-esque because of the self-awareness of it being a poem.

I also liked that you kind of directed your audience in the beginning, only because I'm OH SO HAPPY that someone else shares the correct views about how poetry should be formatted, as it annoys me for some reason when there isn't any punctuation...

Anyway, wonderful use of imagery and all that jazz. This was a really unique well, love poem actually, it came across as that, though at some points it lulled in and out, but I think that was also a contributor to the "you and I" factor of the relationship. I liked how you started with the kind of being "one being" in the second stanza too. Very lovely!
I be a poet lost in morbidity chapter 1 . 1/10/2010
This is so sweet, i love how you compared colors to people and the line "but you are light" makes me think of someone being very close and special to you. I like the layout, the way it is written makes it believable a being spoken to another person with thought and feeling. well done.
for shame chapter 1 . 1/6/2010
this is very cute.

she must feel very special.

i like the idea behind this poem.

it's very simple, in hindsight,

the idea of two people becoming "we"

instead of "you and i".

but i like it. a lot.

it's a simple thing in life that holds a lot of power.
bluewitness chapter 1 . 1/5/2010
First off, I am honored and touched by this lovely bit of prosetry.

Through using the rhythmic guidelines given, I found that the poem takes on a meaning much different than if these rules were disregarded. I thought the small one lines were interesting points of reflection, as if you were pondering what had been said in the stanza prior.

How like a song we are, in our shades and colors; how like a masterpiece, indeed! For prose is merely an element of poetry, just as the sprawling phrases of a poet are essential to prose.

Thank you. :)