|Reviews for Prophecy Of The Fallen|
| aurora101 chapter 4 . 4/3/2011
PLEASE PLEAE UPDATE! I hate cliffehangers its a really good story!
| EclipseoftheHeart chapter 4 . 12/19/2010
Please oh please... This story is really good. Mysterious and so interesting... Please write more... Xx
| Random Things chapter 1 . 6/8/2010
aww, the prologue is so sad! Why did the mum had to be taken away? it really made me cry lol! aww
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| lili999 chapter 1 . 5/26/2010
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| Val Koenen chapter 1 . 5/13/2010
Ok, I am back again. It is good to know that you are still trying to put some time out of your busy schedule to work on this story, I respect that.
From what can I remember of this chapter, you didn't seem to change up the events very much. You did improve on the ending I can see. It appears to summarize the chapter much better than before.
As far as the chapter goes, this specific chapter gives the reader many questions about what happened to the character, what she is going through and what is going to happen next. It also displays much emotion from the tragic events that occurred. That is a definite strong point for this chapter.
All I can really say that you should work on is reading through your chapter a little more. I see some grammar mistakes here and there that don't neccessarily affect the story, but it just sort of feelings you either are constantly making changes to your story or that you just threw together some details of the chapter at the last minute. Keep up the good work and I hope to see more from this story soon.
| xXxR M GxXx chapter 3 . 5/13/2010
So far it is really good, can't wait for the next chapter :)
| DevilishlyAngelic chapter 1 . 5/5/2010
thanks again for review my story..in return i read yours...great beginning by the way, a bit rushed but still great. ;)
| x.x buk wurm x.x chapter 4 . 4/5/2010
gud story , keep em coming
| Val Koenen chapter 4 . 4/3/2010
Good job on this chapter. I actually think this might be your best chapter yet. You defintely gave a more chilling feel to your story from the time Ophelia woke up from the dream.
You are defintely turning this story in a good direction. I don't have much more to say other than that I can't wait to read the next chapter.
| kerrygirl95 chapter 3 . 2/14/2010
its good! well done cant wait to read more!
| Val Koenen chapter 3 . 1/11/2010
Hi there. I don't know if you got the email that I tried to send out earlier. I just figure I will write the same thing I said in a review.
Anyway, you really did a good job of explaining things in this chapter. I can definitely see that you have a good plot written down on paper or in your head. That is key to writing a good story.
After reading this chapter, I only have one question in mind. Who exactly are these "faes"? I tried to research these creatures on Google and I didn't come up with anything in particular. I am guessing that these creatures are made up then. So are the faes humans or do they have superpowers? What are they trying to achieve?
Again you don't have to answer all of these questions in the next chapter. What I suggest that you do is to slowly reveal how powerful these creatures really are. You can do this by either having Ophelia encounter these enemies along the storyline or by showing flashbacks to the audience about how the faes came into this world.
I hope that I am giving an idea about what you are making the audience believe is happening in the story. I personally have always found stories much more interesting when the author always keeps you guessing about what is going to happen next. Keep that in mind.
Well, I myself am creating a story as well. If you wish to read my story, then shoot me an email or leave me a comment and I will get on it. Thanks.
| Val Koenen chapter 2 . 1/6/2010
Hmm...that was an interesting start to the first two chapters of the story. Those chapters definitely put many questions into my head. The first thought running through my mind was about which direction this story is heading into. Is it a supernatural thriller about encounters with the paranormal or about an apocalyptic action novel about a raging war between the humans and the fae? Both of these chapters seemed to go into two different directions.
What I think you can do to tie these two ideas together is to go more in depth about the main character's past (by the way, I didn't even catch what the main character's name is yet). Who were the people who took her mother away from her? You talked in the second chapter about how faes would kidnap people to become their own slaves. Could the people who took the main character's mother away possibly have something to do with the faes?
I know it is too early to tell where this story is headed, just keep in mind what I said. Overall, the story is so far well written. The first chapter introduction caught my attention to read this story all the way through. Keep up the good work.