|Reviews for Marie Laveau|
| FairyMermaid chapter 1 . 9/7/2010
That was scary! Cool story! Don't lie to witches!
| Gespry-Locksley chapter 1 . 5/12/2010
Good story! Love the Bobby Bare song. You might think about going over your verb tenses. You mix present and past tenses a few times.
| RWW chapter 1 . 2/18/2010
First of all let me say thank you for your review of my story (The Lady & The Beings), I really appreciate the kind words! I meant for it to be a children's story but everyone kept saying it was too violent/morbid to be, but I'm glad you saw through it! I mean really, all children stories are extremely violent with a little sugar to make it sweet. Exhibit 1: Humpty Dumpty.
But ANYWAYS! Marie Laveau! Great idea, I loved how you kept the attention on a string. I have to say the poems within the story make it ten times more interesting, I'd even venture to say it would be stronger by itself. I mean really, the poem was extremely well written. "Got a black cat's tooth and a mojo bone." Just rolls off the tongue, perfect image.
As for the other writing, I definitely think you jumbled up your thoughts and threw it down. The pace is very quick, almost too quick. Please, if ever you revise this, add more girth where it needs it. I want to know more about trials of Jack and the journey to Ms. Laveau. It has so much to tell but I can see restraint. But I understand it's a one-shot, so I'm not too bothered.
Great story Kidlady! And thanks again for the review!
| Cynthia Brent chapter 1 . 1/20/2010
I really love this story - but where can I find the song? The only Zydeco group I know about is Beausoleil - did they ever record this? I really want to know!
| Punslinger chapter 1 . 1/15/2010
It was good to read the lyrics of the old song. I can't remember how many years ago I last heard it sung. You did a very good job of creating a story around it. But I don't know why you changed from second person to first and from past tense to present.