Reviews for This isn't it
ADeskLamp1 chapter 17 . 8/9/2012
*sniff* I love this story. Please continue!
TheWorldOfLove chapter 17 . 7/25/2011
Please update!~ If you can't right now it'd be awesome if you added a chapter at least for his birthday :)
TheWorldOfLove chapter 16 . 7/25/2011
Michael is just adorable! In here and he was in real life also. And he can't STAY AWAY from a mic!~ :) loveee it.
TheWorldOfLove chapter 7 . 7/17/2011
This is insanely cute!~ *gushes* I love MJ. Awesome idea story~
doors down chapter 3 . 6/20/2010
great job with chapter 3! AGAIN, THIS IS A MASTERPIECE! you never disappoint! ever!
doors down chapter 2 . 5/1/2010
engrossing. u should be damm proud. and thanks for loving my idol.
Someone-Whos-Not-Important chapter 1 . 3/11/2010
ooh mysterious! I like it!
imadreamr36aol.com chapter 17 . 3/10/2010
very good,kept me interested,want more to read!very,very impressed...love Aunt Wendy
Devil's Playground chapter 2 . 3/4/2010
Well this is certainly a... unique concept for a story. XD I've never seen anything like it, that's for sure.

You should be careful with the mood of the story - reading through, at first I wasn't sure whether or not it was supposed to be humorous.

The descriptions of Michael were good, but they did came off a little fangirly because you commented a lot on how attractive he is and such. He's kind of coming off as a Mary Sue at this point. Since he was a real person it must be hard to write flaws into the character, but I hope you manage to find a way to do so anyway.

The narrator's character seems a little underdeveloped at this point. I was really confused throughout this - she seems to change her opinions a lot... and really quickly. Like, how did she change her opinion about the allegations against Michael only by listening to his music? Why was she so excited about Michael one moment, and then resenting him for being around the next? It doesn't make any sense.

Also, you have your dialogue like this:

"It seems as though your daughter doesn't like me very much, Mr. Fleming." He said.

It should be formatted like this:

"It seems as though your daughter doesn't like me very much, Mr. Fleming," he said.
elmoluv97 chapter 17 . 3/1/2010
this story had me laughing my head off i think!;(:
briana chapter 15 . 2/23/2010
AH! i just finished reading the chapter what happened in the shack. i wanna slap travis and all his friends. how could his friends let him do this to poor morgan, and actually watch!i thought he was goin to rape her!i was so happy when, micheal and the crew came in to save her! totally love that part! i could just see them slamming each other into the walls and stuff. i didnt expect this to happen it took me by super suprise! if that makes sense... :)
briana chapter 12 . 2/22/2010
thriller is like the best chapter! then comes you rock my world which is so sweet and perfectly good timing. finally you are not alone! no! she was supposed to say yes! i was so mad i felt like cryin with her. and when he was driving that was kind of weird and funny. then the waitor! HAHAHA his accent was so hilarious. and these weird dreams shes having creep me out i wonder what they mean? the thing i like about this book is that theres no boring parts that drag on and on its very fast paced and straight to the point just like i like it! although you need and editor... :) keep the chapters goin!
iwillbealwaysadreamer chapter 8 . 2/22/2010
Writing this as I read.

-'but vetoed it' What?

-Aw. They didn't kiss or go out together or anything like that.

-'whenever I was sad, or board'. I think you meant 'bored' rather than the other sort of board

-'It was mostly was when' Where'd's the 'was' come from?

-Yeah, I heard about Haiti, too. It was really shocking. When you put about that, you didn't put a closing speech mark after her mum told them about the earthquake.

-Hey! I guess I'm not the only one whose skin goes a funny blotchy purple colour when I'm cold! :D

-'thinking your are an octopus' You don't need an 'r' on the end of 'you'.

-How can that sound racist? Anyways, I don't blame Morgan for thinking he looked better when he was black.

-OMG, I like the idea of Taylor Swift performing at the school! I'm listening to one of her songs right now.

-I probably sound stupid saying this, but, what are bleachers?

-' I shivered and out the coat around me' Huh?

-'The cloud got up' I think you can see the mistake there.

-A little after that, in the sentence starting with 'Micheal stayed on', there should be a 'for'. You'll see where it is.

-Lol, they're giggling hyperactively. Remind you of anyone? No, wait, you wouldn't know that it should remind you of me. Oh well. :)

-Lol, she screamed in whats-her-face's face. Lol.

-'Eric's grinned' Spot the mistake?

-Love it! Too good to say 'I loveses', which is, like, 'so me'! :) :) :)
iwillbealwaysadreamer chapter 7 . 2/22/2010
Okay! I'm writing this as I write.

-Mistake alert! I think. This doesn't quite make sense: 'I enlarged the image showed Michael, he raised an eyebrow.' Wait, it does. No, it doesn't. No, it needs an extra comma after 'image'. Sorry for being picky.

-'"What about him."' Two things: 1)It needs a question mark. 2) I don't get what she's on about when she says this.

-Mistake alert! 'with to much'. There should be an extra 'o' in 'to/too'. There was a mistake like this in the previous chapter, but I didn't see it when I scanned back through.

-(Mistake?) alert! 'Wow, know in every county, too?"' It doesn't quite make sense. I think if you change it to 'I'm known' instead of just 'know', or something like that, it would make more sense.

-Mistake alert! '"He O. on drugs. He died."' You could have put: '"He... Oh. Was on drugs. He died."' Or something like that.

-She said she really likes him... Ooh, does she love him? :) Please say she does! :)

- 'You are the victim here'! That's nice of Morgan to say that! Not. Oh well. :)

-Why does she think she's, like, a super-horrible person now? I mean, I guess I knid of know that, but she's assuming that he hates her now. I hope he doesn't...

-Mistake alert! 'and now he new' Wrong kind of 'new/knew'!

-Oh, that bit is so sweet! I didn't think he'd hate her! Please say she loves him! Please say he loves her! No, you don't need to... :)

-Aah! Wow! I loveses! :)
iwillbealwaysadreamer chapter 6 . 2/22/2010
Bother. I was just writing a review while I was reading the chapter, and then when I finished it, I pressed the review button again, and the one I was writing kind of disappeared... I'm going to rewrite it.

Okay, there were some tiny mistakes. These are going to be in reverse order, because I'm going back through the chapter looking for the mistakes that I would have pointed out to you in the first review -growls at self-. :) Anyways, here are the mistakes in case you want to correct them:

5?)'an old dusted u photograph' Is the 'u' supposed to be there?

4?)'looked at the clattered garage' I can't remember what I put, so I'll just point out the 'a' in 'cluttered'.

3?)I didn't notice this before, but I thought I'd let you know anyway. 'I stared at the flattened piece of tin with huge eyes,' The comma was supposed to be a fullstop. It's okay, a very easy mistake to do.

There were more, but I can't find them. You could have a good look through and correct any mistakes that you see. If you don't like it when I point out all the mistakes, then please tell me, I totally understand. I would just like to say that I would like people to inform me of any mistakes in my stories when they review, which is why I tend to point out mistakes to other people.

Anyways, I likeses! Is Morgan going to tell Micheal that he's a clone? No, don't tell me! I'll find out in a minute. :) :)
50 | Page 1 2 3 .. Last Next »