Reviews for Failing
frugale chapter 1 . 2/23/2010
WOW. I thought the image was powerful and the summary was SUPER catchy.

I love allcaps for a reason.
theory of black chapter 1 . 2/12/2010
I love this. For me, it brings a sense of someone trying desperately hard to hold on to either innocence, times that have passed, or maybe just trying to be true to themselves but all the energies around them are contradicting it. I like how you used the image of wires, too, because wires are generally thought of as strong; at least stronger than string or rope. It shows how strong the struggle is.

Or maybe it's simply an elevated haiku about someone who was trying to concentrate but kept getting distracted.

Either way, it's fabulous :)
Katie Nicole chapter 1 . 2/4/2010
beautiful and depressing. hm. I like it (:
Faithless Juliet chapter 1 . 2/1/2010
I like the parallel of structure in this piece. The Marionette makes me think of someone with perfect balance and posture - a living statue of controll, if you will, while your use of 'disassembled' makes me think of caotic thoughts bouncing from one thing to the other. A very strong piece, keep up the good work.

Much love,

Punslinger chapter 1 . 2/1/2010
I like the thought here and it is well expressed. However, my math may be wrong, but I count only 6 sylables in the second line, not 7.
Isca chapter 1 . 1/31/2010
"Marionette on fraying wires." What a Vaudevillian image. I love it. :)
nickyO chapter 1 . 1/31/2010
darkly wonderful. Good job.
Daiysis chapter 1 . 1/31/2010
Wow.. it's quite sad, isn't it?

It's nice though, good work.