|Reviews for A Box Full of Cookies|
| chocoholic dreamer chapter 1 . 3/22/2010
april fools day.. i didn't see that one coming. nice plot through.
| calasin chapter 1 . 3/12/2010
aw. that was so sad. (
as if that stupid guy played that prank on her, that's horrible. i thought he genuinely liked her (kinda forgot that it was the first of april)
i hate mean people, i would've taken one of her cookies D
| yinachan chapter 1 . 3/11/2010
this story is so adorable! i didn't see that one coming.. XD
anyway, good job! i like this work! :)
| soundless.dissonance chapter 1 . 3/6/2010
This was absolutely adorable, in a completely disgusting way. 8D Your language really gave the protagonist a well-developed personality, and the story unfolded perfectly-I really enjoyed the read. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to comb through for grammar errors. :D
I think I'm doing something wrong, taking a faulty approach to the problem]]
I don't think you can use a comma there; I'd use a dash. Not entirely positive, though.
Everyone loves cookies don't they?]]
Comma after cookies. (:
And to top off my general uselessness I'm hideous.]]
Comma after uselessness.
...Actually. If you want, I could copy and paste the whole thing into Word and DocX it to you with corrections. Let me know. Now I'm worried this sounds horribly mean, but I actually really enjoyed the story, and I thought your plot was easy enough to follow while still being totally creative with the development of events. Keep writing!
| Eisley-Eyes chapter 1 . 2/23/2010
i thought is was cute! very clever. i appreciate your writing style.
| ChocolateGun chapter 1 . 2/20/2010
Oh, what a cruel reality for poor girl :( I'm really sorry for her, just because she's looking horrible doesn't mean they have to make fun of her :( . Okay, probably she's really ugly, but she could take care of that...I dunno, get some make-up, do something about the hair and about clothes...maybe her classmates could help.
Anyway, I really enjoyed it, it was like a cup of hot chocolate :) . Thanks :) .
| TellHerStory chapter 1 . 2/19/2010
Ok. I really like this. Its adorable
I really didn't think is was depressing
Yes she had a very low self esteem
But to me it seemed she still had a since of humor
She didn't cry or anything when Trev teased her
She was still worried about her cookies
I love the last line
I loved it
Keep it up
Romance? This isn't very romantic...but o well
| Anise Cary chapter 1 . 2/18/2010
That sadistic piece of glass finds it fun to gloat and mock me every morning. - I love the personification in this line, excellent job.
What mother would be proud? - ok that line just makes me want to give this girl a hug, then say to her "if you don't love yourself how in the hell is anyone else gonna love you"
I’d like to get in on the action sometime. - I think some time should be two words here
That’s what I admire in those girls. They tell it like it is. They’re truth tellers. And they are much more pleasant-looking than disgusting old carrot-top me. - this poor girl, she needs a serious self-confidence boost, she's just asking to be ridiculed
April the 1st eh? No wonder no-one ate my cookies… - I love this last line. Maybe her self-esteem is just not something she's worried about, such a practical ending thought.
| sealednectar chapter 1 . 2/17/2010
Oh gosh, this was depressing and so awful for Garnet. I felt so horrible for her. Poor girl. This is one of my worst nightmares, people can be so mean.
I knew it was a prank though, but it was still sad to read. Ouch.
| Ivix chapter 1 . 2/17/2010
lo poor her.. Yeah ,, this deserves another chap :p
| sandcastlesinthesand chapter 1 . 2/17/2010
OH MY GOD!
That was perhaps one of the most depressing things I have ever read!
| Noda chapter 1 . 2/17/2010
How is this romance? -.-
Also, I kept on thinking they were in elementary school or something, not high school...