Reviews for Two Autumn Haiku
nickyO chapter 1 . 2/21/2010
Good job on both. Number 2 is my fav. :)
frugale chapter 1 . 2/19/2010
I. In the front yard

Gaily colored leaves

Dance beneath our maple tree:

He continues green.


II. On Interstate 75, with the radio on

Pounding autumn rains

Almost drown the gentle songs –

Even as in life.

There are so many reasons why I like this piece. The matter-of-factly 'chapter-like' enumeration. The flawless formatting. The odd 'continues' green that makes the two sides of my brain argue ("ungrammatical!' vs 'creative license!'). The possessive ('my' maple tree) that gives the whole haiku so much flavour. The cryptic message of the second one that seeps through every crack of my brain and lingers on and on and on...


MaxAndTwiFan chapter 1 . 2/18/2010
I really like it! Although in the 'I. In the front yard' I think it should be 'It continues green,' not 'He continues to green.'

But that's just my opinion, and I'm not an expert at Haiku's.

Great job!