|Reviews for Senji Works|
| Limit Removal chapter 46 . 4/17/2011
I've read every chapter up to this one, and I must say, a great story. Unfortunately the start is pretty weak and drives away a lot of potential reader.
The premise is great, it gives you limitless potential which direction the story will develop to. And the characters, while some I disliked, are mostly interesting and stand out from each other, creating a certain feel of diversity (something I have yet to achieve in my stories).
My impression when reading chapter one is: "Wow, how dull and cliche..." but I pushed forwards and things just get better and better the further I read. So my suggestion is to "revamp" the earlier chapters up to eleven.
Something I noticed about Harima is... Well, he practically does nothing in every mission he takes except the casino and haunted house one. At least he fulfilled his role as a cleaner (and probably the only 'Normal person' personality-wise) in Senji Works. I'm surprised he hasn't entered the typical "I'm only a burden" phase, but I'll left the character development to you.
I'm looking forward to the battle against the rest of the Fears; and what Harima's other Free powers are once he unlocks them.
Peace, sorry if anything in this review is wrong and/or offends you.
| Louis-sama chapter 1 . 4/14/2011
Hi there. This is a good story, I shall say. The humors are well-delivered and easy to understand. The characters (for the first chapter, at least) are enjoyable, especially Senji. I love his thinking process, it's hilarious. Overall, an enjoyable read and I shall read the next chapters.
Thanks for the review. If you have time, why don't you take a look into it, again?
| Chika Hanabi chapter 45 . 4/13/2011
"...until I see prove that..." The prove needs to be changed to proof.
"Kayo returned his smile with another smile" You don't need the 'with another smile'. Just "Kayo returned his smile" is fine.
Interesting chapter. So that's why Senji knows the Fear of Destiny so well, he was an ex-employee. Wonder why he went like that. And I wonder how Harima gets a Free Ability. I wonder how anyone gets a Free Ability. I know how to get the Soul Free, but what about the others? Can't wait for the next update!
| Mysterious MD chapter 44 . 4/10/2011
That was a good chapter. The only spot I was unsure of was when you had; "The man looked ridiculous but Akina and Senji wasn't going to insult his looks because of one reason." I think "wasn't" should be "weren't" in this case, but I'm not positive. We see Senji take down Shin and then show that he has the syringe to help heal his arms. He's also got a new ally. Then we have the Fear of Difference come in out of nowhere. I look forward to reading what happens next, keep up the good writing.
| Chika Hanabi chapter 44 . 4/9/2011
Oh man, another "battle" already? Just after the first one, too! And Senji doesn't even have both arms. Joy for him. And how is the Fear of Difference a fear of - oh wait no pretend you didn't read that. I get it now. xD
| Mysterious MD chapter 43 . 4/8/2011
That was another good chapter. It was well written, I didn't encounter any spelling or grammar errors. We see Senji fight off Shin pretty well, and prove him wrong on his statement. We see him activate his Nature free ability and now the fight is picking up. I look forward to reading more, keep up the good writing.
| Chika Hanabi chapter 43 . 4/8/2011
Another surprise! Senji has a Nature Free. Drains the life out of everything huh...it's the aura of them, right? (Ah, me and my wild guesses). What would Shin do with taking - oh wait, cliffhanger. Gahh
| Mysterious MD chapter 42 . 4/8/2011
That was an intense chapter. It was well written, I don't think I encountered any spelling or grammar errors. We get to see the Fear of Reality take down Kira and then damage Senji pretty badly. I look forward to reading what happens next, keep up the good writing.
| Chika Hanabi chapter 42 . 4/5/2011
Oh my. Senji fighting with a large, gaping and bleeding hole in his shoulder...I fear he might die of blood loss more than Shin's attacks. I've just noticed how many characters you've had Senji Works defeat. Wonder how you can keep coming up with new abilities. But that's a good thing!
I'm getting curious about Atsuko's past. A person from an insignificant kingdom I see...interesting.
| FakeFiction chapter 42 . 4/5/2011
I have been reading your continued little saga, but unfortunately, haven't been able to review it (the last thing I want to do after lots of notes and papers is to write even more after reading).
With that, I am grateful you are continuing your writing ever since that hiatus. The little abilities and twists make the story open-ended and unpredictable, and you exploited that to full advantage, I think, during the first part of the "Fear" arc. The action is quite stimulating in a way that makes you think...
I do like the dynamics of each recent arc you put in, carnivals & casinos, dates & regalty... This Rei character promises to be a good one, I think she does compliment Harima well on the workforce.I do think, though, that Aoi must be the ultimate villain behind all of this, in some twisted manner of some sort. Whether or not that's true, I still enjoy her easy obliviousness and complacency to everything. And I think Harima will never find out about his ability (anticlimaticism for the win).
You know, my kindergarten teacher always said, "Use your imagination to solve the problems in the real world"...
| Mysterious MD chapter 41 . 4/1/2011
That was another good chapter. I did spot a possible error or two. You had; "Atsuko had a time keeping her eyes open and Kira assumed she couldn't move." where I think you meant to say "Atsuko had a hard time". We get to see more of Kira's ability and he manages to fight the fear of the disturbing and win. Then we see the fear or reality is quite smart and knows that Senji was faking his death. I look forward to seeing where this goes next, keep up the good writing.
| Mysterious MD chapter 40 . 4/1/2011
That was an interesting chapter. It was well written, and I think I only spotted one area I was unsure of. You had; "Rei constant yelling in Harima's ear," where I think it should be "Rei's constant yelling". We see them fight the fear of the disturbing and then Kira come in after beating Shiya. I look forward to reading more, keep up the good writing.
| FictionismyGame chapter 2 . 3/30/2011
Ha, I love this story. You know what it kind of reminds me of, though? xHolic, but just with the interaction between the new shop guy who has to work off his debt, like Watanuki has to do if he wants his wish of getting rid of the spirits, he has to work for Yuko.
| Chika Hanabi chapter 41 . 3/29/2011
I seriously feel like an idiot for forgetting who Kira is. I think his ability is actually working on me o_O but then again, you never specified what type of Free that moving-attention ability was, so I guess I was pretty confused.
Instead of using the name so much, you can use 'he' or 'she'. Make's it sort of easier, unless you're talking about two characters with the same gender. In the case of Miko and Kira's fight, it would work to use 'he' and 'she'.
See, "The blood then to swirl around until the blood became a whirlpool" I believe you can replace the second 'the blood' with 'it'. The meaning is still the same. Also between "the blood" and "to swirl" I think you forgot to put in a word.
That's a nice insight to Kira's Free. So he can erase his existence for three seconds...That's useful, indeed! the Fear of Reality seems a little cocky, don't you think? Then again, he does know what 'Reality' is, so I guess he could be like that. Hope you update soon!
| Chika Hanabi chapter 40 . 3/28/2011
Ooh Kira's Physical Free...Speed perhaps? It also seems to be that you're missing words here and there, so you may want to give it another read-through to find as many mistakes as possible.