|Reviews for Chemistry|
| Silencia chapter 1 . 4/19/2010
Wonderful story I also like the ending, such open endings always make the readers want more, very nice touch to the story XD
| Peace Flower chapter 1 . 2/24/2010
Hm. Well, on the up side I think you are a good narrative writer. First-person is botched easily, but I think you did well.
On the down side, I'd say I have to agree heavily with blurrylights. I know it's supposed to be open-ended, but I think I was left with TOO many questions. Why did they get married? Why does he feel they're incompatible? The age difference? Or more than that? Does she care for him or just want to prove her worth? What time period is it even? O_O; It just doesn't last quite long enough to draw you in. I also feel that the summary is a bit misrepresenting. By the end of the story, he is clearly attracted to her in a big way. So in most readers minds I'm sure the story ends with the two of them eventually developing a "normal" marriage.
I know that this is all you intended to write, but it just seems somewhat unfinished. On the other hand, if the reader is supposed to feel this way...well done.
| blurrylights chapter 1 . 2/23/2010
I honestly think this was way to short for you to get the point across. We knew nothing about the characters throughout the entire piece, and then it just ended. Why were they in an arranged marriage? What are they like together? Were they forced into it? Had they dated before hand?
You just put it out there that Tim thinks they aren't compatible. Why does he think that way? Were there any awkward conversations between them?
And the ending just happened so suddenly. It just came out of nowhere. We never knew how exactly Kate felt about him (did she think he was attractive? Did she like his cologne? Was there a special trait about him that made her want to try to make their marriage work?)
I think that this has potential, but it just doesn't have any substance as of now. You never talk about what it feels like to be in one, or how Kate/Tim felt. With a little work, this could really be an excellent piece.