I surprisingly like this story. hm interesting.

cant wait for next chapter

I like this. Please keep writing - I wanna know what happens next!

I really lve your story, it's so different. It's like a breath of fresh air. Please continue it! I'll be waiting :)

Wow, this is getting good. Love Death's POV. It's really starting to come together, and your grammar has improved-well done. Eagerly awaiting more.

good idea 2 write a bit from his point of view!

Absolutely Love this story.

OH! I love it! It adds so much depth and mystery to Death!

This is beautiful! Please hurry with the next chapter! And I love how you used Death's POV. It's great to get some characterisation of him into here and not just Ariane's.

I get that you're attemtping to describe death as a genderless being in the begining, but it makes no sense when you say "they clutched their tall scythe" or "they turned their head". Makes it seem like there is more than one 'Death', and it's a bit confusing and makes your writing read amateur.

Since you refer to Death as a male at the end of the chapter, you ought to do so throughout the entirety of it.

I hope this helps!

~Saff

This is a gud and interesting story

i loved it... can say what i loved about it but it had... something...

I cant lie. I really like this story. Loving death was a change in topic than most stories. Description was very helpful of location and people in the story. The only problem is that its only in Ariane's view and i want to know what the Grim Reaper is thinking.

ACK! Tank you so much for updating befor Sunday! :) I love how his seems so...bipolar. its very intruguing!

OMG! WRITE MORE! I love the story line!

who said "And a liar you are, thief." at the end?