Reviews for A Texan in Ancient Rome
Brenda Agaro chapter 1 . 3/23/2010
I like the magical realism in this poem. Very intriguing, even with the girl not being who she's supposed to be (according to others) all along.
Isca chapter 1 . 3/22/2010
"Saluting her salve." Not only is the 's' alliteration striking, but the little inclusion of Latin made me smile. :)

"A freshly raped slave girl." Ah, yes. I'm glad you placed this line where you did; the tone of the opening of the piece is a bit relatable, but the brutality of this line tied everything together quite nicely.

I liked the internal rhyming in this piece too: like whores/fore(fathers)/storm, thumb/numb, scream/seem, etc.
no.peace.los.angeles chapter 1 . 3/21/2010
Excellent. I love how I can read this and feel the dust from the streets in my mouth. The last two lines are spectacular, and I also really like "the fresh staccato sun-heat." It's such an apt description of how the sun feels sometimes, probably even more so in Texas/Ancient Rome. Very nicely done, as always. Keep writing! :)
Kate Marshall chapter 1 . 3/20/2010
First of all, your language in this is very pretty. :) You've chosen your words carefully, and it gives this pieces a nice sound and rhythm. Particularly I like this: "like a lighter lover." You had some wonderful alliteration and word play.

The contrast of ancient and modern is interesting in this. I thought you handled it well; the imagery was creative. Vivid.

And I like these lines for several reasons:

A catastrophe along the catacombs,

a freshly raped slave girl sucking back

blood, or a cowboy rerouting a truck route

into the senate building.

"Catastrophe along the catacombs" - great alliteration. Although this piece does not rhyme, you've given it its own rhythm with alliteration like this. And your love is delightful to read; it's somewhere between frank and dignified. Very interesting. Avant garde. :)

A lovely poem!

Kate (EF RG review)
YasuRan chapter 1 . 3/18/2010
Woah.

The sub-text is in this... truly a Rashomon-esque piece where the scenario can be depicted in so many ways. Definitely adding to my faves.