More words more emotion... and it'd be better to imagine what the character is feeling and what her surroundings appear to look like...

I thought it was funny when the caller was the 'president' and thought it was funny... so i didn't take it seriously... work on it a bit more

I think I just started crying. Oh, that's embarassing to admit. I just have this soft spot for twins, maybe 'cause I was one...and he just died...Yeah...I'm gonna slowly back away before I ruin my laptop. Water isn't good for it, you know.

That was good, showing the emotions and building the suspense well. However, showing more descrpiption and more of her thoughts would have made the story better and more intense. Sorry for taking so long to read it, I had completely forgotten about it.

This is good. There were a few typoes, and telling it in present tense seemed a little awkward, but I like the way Liam seemed to know something was wrong. I'm curious to see where this goes, and I'm honored that I was able to inspire you to write this.