Reviews for Greek Gods and Goddesses Poetry Project
Eva Rieycoit chapter 1 . 5/30/2010
Ah, Chaos. The first thing to exist. :)

A nice poem, though I think it would better convey the 'chaos' if the lines were more... chaotic. You know, as in, random lines like some poems employ? But that's purely up to the author. Great job!
A. Barone chapter 8 . 5/30/2010
I always felt bad for Atlas and I think that you captured his feelings perfectly. Well done.
A. Barone chapter 7 . 5/30/2010
Ah, now here's the Hera poem. I liked it. You captured her vengeful side but interjected a bit of pity in there as well. Well done.
A. Barone chapter 6 . 5/30/2010
I can tell that you hate Zeus and his adulterous ways, but you didn't mention that Hera took out her anger by causing problems of her own...
A. Barone chapter 5 . 5/30/2010
I like how you've given Hades a heart with this poem. Too often you find that he's the bad guy who has kidnapped Persephone. I like how you've given Hades a heart. Wonderful poem!
A. Barone chapter 4 . 5/30/2010
A good poem. You explained the role of Lethe excellently, however I didn't know that Lethe was a minor goddess. I thought it was just the name of the river in the underworld.
A. Barone chapter 3 . 5/30/2010
Again, very nice. I like this poem but the one criticism I would have, would be that you didn't explain how Zeus escaped his father's wrath and how Kronos swallowed a stone in his place- other than that I really did like this poem.
A. Barone chapter 2 . 5/30/2010
Nice. I love this beautifully simple poem. Well done.
A. Barone chapter 1 . 5/30/2010
Nice. Good cadence and tone. You reveal the personality of Chaos quite well here.
Devil's Playground chapter 2 . 5/30/2010
Awh, Gaia. It's such a pretty name.

There are some very good lines in this - I love the ones about her watching over her children, it really helps personify her as a mother. I think you could expand on that idea, though. This doesn't have the same insight into personality/motivation that the Chaos one did, and I feel like you could add to it with how she feels about everything she has birthed, or something like that.

I also love the image of the Earth and the Sky embracing at the horizon - that's so lovely. It's a beautiful thing to imagine, for sure. And, as always, a great ending to the poem - that seems to be one of your strong points, for sure. Your poems always seem to lead up to those final lines, which give a final pow! as the poem ends, haha. :)
Devil's Playground chapter 1 . 5/30/2010
Aah so cool! I've always loved the Greek creation myth - I find it fascinating that chaos was the first thing that existed. I love your personification of it, and your explanation for the motives behind the creation or everything - simply because he wanted people to see his disorder, haha. I love that he seems playful - that's exactly how I would picture chaos.

There was only one line I didn't like: "It was chaos, without noise, fear or war." - Just a personal preference, but I think that you could use a word other than chaos there, since you already refer to Chaos a lot throughout the poem, and in this line you don't seem to even be speaking about the god himself, but just the noun. I know that you have a way of stating things very creatively, so I'm sure you could find another way to word that line that would make it more impactful.

I feel like maybe you could expand on the idea of order - you say that Chaos resents it, but it's necessary. You could put in some examples of why it was necessary / if Chaos resisted the creation of order / etc.

The ending to the poem is excellent. Great lines, and it's an absolutely perfect way to wrap up the poem. The final line, especially, is just lovely.
Serendipitist Swan chapter 1 . 5/30/2010
Hi, I was going to review Persephone's Flight but I saw that you had less reviews for this and I just love Greek Mythology so...

Anyway. I can imagine this so clearly and even though I always thought Chaos was a dark entity now I'm thinking a multitude of colors. Complete disorder and clashing. Needless to say, I thought this was very good. Except I don't know if Chaos was a God. Wasn't he just Chaos?
Broken Bird chapter 1 . 5/28/2010
I really enjoyed this poem. It tells the story without being clunky or unpoetic, if y'know what I mean. Very interesting, in a very good way
sophiesix chapter 2 . 5/14/2010
Short but effective! I wuold consider making it even a titch shorter: consider taking 'she is the' out of:

"Born of Chaos,

She is the true Mother Earth,"

to repeat the three beats of the first line and give a rythm like a First Nations drum!
sophiesix chapter 1 . 5/14/2010
ooh this has a lovely rhythm to it, like a greek chorus or something, powerful. i liked teh way you chopped up teh phrases to emphasise teh meaning. I think you could chop some even shorter, like: "There, for an immeasurable amount of time." could be:

There

for an immeasurable amount of time.

maybe. but nicely evoked Chaos anyway as well as telling that story of teh first gods. great stuff!
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