|Reviews for Wolf Bite|
| dilare aizezi chapter 24 . 1/7
Please continue even though it ended!
| Ray-Anne chapter 23 . 12/11/2015
Well all in all a good story. As always, a completed story in itself deserves its praise. It's hard work to complete a story.
You have numerous typing errors (I've decided that I do not think it is necessarily spelling errors, I think you just don't proof read and perhaps type too quickly ;))
You have some grammar issues, you should definitely read up on how to properly address conversations (quotes). But really that's fine. I don't expect polished work by any means.
Overall the story had a good arc. It was predictable, but it did have some nice little things. The DNA bonding before babies quip was interesting (although how she got pregnant in a week is a little strange) and I liked the insert about Rio's original pack becoming smaller as he lost her and what is happening to them. It's a good entry to a second book without really needing one.
I'm surprised they're in Anchorage and around the area since their names doesn't really match that but all good.
I liked most of the characters; you did a fairly decent job of fleshing the important ones out. The side characters could use some work but you had a lot, a lot of characters so it says something in itself that I didn't get them confused. I wish you'd have time skipped some of the time from the main characters meeting and Rio coming but it wasn't necessary. Despite it being an at-first sight mated thing ... You got a great glimpse of her struggle with it. It could have been really fleshed out more and been superb but really the glimpses were great. You don't get that often as people typically just have that bad ass girl turn softy once mated and there is no inner struggle or power play. You had that.
I do wish her job would have stuck with her though, being a bounty hunter. Him as a sheriff would have made that an interesting dynamic ;)
Overall, I liked it. It has some really great moments. You could use some tightening up and cleaning up but hey all good.
| Ray-Anne chapter 17 . 12/11/2015
Although it was surprisingly not confusing you switched pov several times in this. I'd be careful about it however because it can get confusing. Practicing in third may get what you want to portray
| Ray-Anne chapter 16 . 12/11/2015
I just want to note that the DNA bite marking thing for babies was a very clever idea. I'm not sure if I have heard that one
| Ray-Anne chapter 3 . 12/10/2015
You've got a couple spelling/typing errors. Nothing too big but since it's your first couple of chapters and this your first impression you should consider cleaning it up. Really need to do a simple proof read. Its hard to read in some places. You've also got a really awkward paragraphs in there that's very telly.
As a writer sometimes you have to think logistically. Now I've only read the first three chapters so I may find out why in a bit, but I'm already questioning why someone would bother buying a house if they know they're on the run...?
I'm also a little disappointed your doing duel pov. Mostly because ... They sound so... Similar. It's just like being in the same head. Maybe this will change. For now I'm going to keep reading but bear these things in mind.
Still, its a fairly interesting concept so far and I am curious to read more
| Guest chapter 11 . 12/19/2013
Here are the reasons I'm not gonna read any further, in no particular order:
1. Your grammar, it's very good in some ways, and some of the worst I've ever seen in others. The inconsistency is rather remarkable.
2. The girl is a werewolf as well as the boy. I find this to be very boring.
3. You implied that she was raped by this man, whoever he is. I can't deal with that.
4. You implied she's kissed a bunch of men. I find this to be slutty in it's own way, probably because I didn't have my first kiss until I was nearly seventeen, and even then it was with my boyfriend at the time. To date, I have only ever kissed two guys, and so I find it nearly impossible to relate to characters who have kissed a bunch of guys.
5. She's not modest about her body. In front of women I can understand, but men? Unless the guy is gay, I find it horribly disgusting to allow anyone to see it, werewolf or not.
| Guest chapter 3 . 12/19/2013
Aw man, what a shame. I hate it when the girl's a wolf, it's boring.
| Guest chapter 1 . 12/19/2013
Nice story. I suspected, however, that it might be rather amateur, and it would seem I am correct. You see, in a summary, the phrase "what happens when" appears so often that it is ridiculously repetitive and, in my experience, suggests that the author is, ah, shall we say, not exceptionally adept. I rarely even bother clicking on stories with that in their summary, but I must say I am pleased I made an exception. It needs some very serious editing. Keep in mind that commas signify pauses, so place them where you would pause when speaking. However, please don't think that I'm saying its bad, because I do like it. It just needs quite a bit of fixing.
| Alpha Sam chapter 24 . 12/9/2013
Very good! A few errors at the beginning but very good
| Cdelancy chapter 24 . 1/2/2013
This was a very good story and it had a beautiful ending.
| cotton00 chapter 24 . 11/12/2012
this story is amazing.
I really like it but you might want to edit this story, dear.
don't worry, it's just a few grammatical errors here and there
anyway, keep up the good work!
| leah2annyahoo.c chapter 21 . 8/9/2012
ive read this story twice now and i still like FACT that ive read it twice says YOU FOR WRITING!(its .com my eamail)
| nightshade97 chapter 24 . 7/1/2012
LOVE IT! XD Really good read, i didnt want to leave my computer, get it published if its not:)
| non.graceful chapter 1 . 6/30/2012
Again, another story added to your site and it's amazing.
| SierraChee chapter 24 . 6/22/2012
This is so cute! Good job!