|Reviews for Elemental Escape|
| Sammyjon123 chapter 9 . 6/25/2010
Good chapter, though it seemed to be another type of rushed, yet not rushed. :-/ Does that make sense? Basically, you still didn't rush the actual details, but you seemed to be in a hurry and wanted to type fast, making a few grammatical errors. There are several places where I couldn't figure out if someone was talking and you forgot quotation marks, or it was an animal-talking thing un-italicized, or just awkwardly phrased. Towards the end of the chapter, one of the sentences is,
"I know it sounded weird, but that's the look he gave me was both."
You could say,
"That's the look he gave me,"
"The look he gave me was both,"
but the way it's written now doesn't make too much sense. Similar things apply to a few other spots throughout the chapter, I just can't remember which ones. :-/ Anyways, despite grammatical mistakes, it was a good chapter. I wonder if Cohryn had somethig to do with the scorpions? xD strangely, he wasn't mentioned at all in that one. and he hasn't appeared in a while o_O Did you kill him?
| Boredom Inspired chapter 9 . 6/25/2010
Hahahaha! Great story! Elemental, gentic enhancements, a small mousy girl bossing around two stuck-up dudes...Way too fun!
Keep Writing! The plot is cute. The characters are interesting. I just hope the little mousy girl stays mousy. There's been a problem among lots of writers here where the spunky heroine becomes too spunky, and she just turns out annoying. I like subject A the way she is right now. Cute and meek, easily scared, but brave when she needs to be.
| Sirens And Muses chapter 8 . 6/23/2010
Siren: Whoo, they escaped!
Muse: Sorry for the late review. Computer issues.
Siren: That having been said, update! Seriously, I wanna know what happens next.
| crunchycookies chapter 8 . 6/20/2010
I'm loving yr story.. Update soon!
| Sammyjon123 chapter 8 . 6/19/2010
Is that a crush on A I see V developing? xD You know, if you put their names together, you get AMV, like Anime Music Video. I just realized as I was writing this review.
Good chapter! It seemed... Rushed, yet not rushed. Rushed in the sense that it went at a very fast pace, at least for me, yet not rushed as in it didn't skip over any details. Well, none that I noticed. Personally, I love chapters that pull that off, where you can condense so much into, like, two to four minutes of the characters' time, and yet not miss any major details.
Very good, but I may have to make your school go out of business if it demands so much time you could be writing with. XD Just kidding.
| Kyre Crow chapter 8 . 6/19/2010
I liked the way you started this chapter in the middle-ish of carrying out a plan. However, I thought that at parts it was confusing, and I will probably have to reread a few times to understand it all.
I also thought that this chapter was a little too fast-paced, like the previous. I think it made the chapter a bit hard to concentrate on. Just my opinion, though.
However, I really liked the character development in this chapter, us readers got to see more of Subject V.
I'm not exactly sure what the point of explaining the plan was, will it be important?
Still, you seem to just keep writing great things, the happenings are things I never thought of. Great job. Keep going! I want to know what'll happen next!
| Kyre Crow chapter 7 . 6/12/2010
Well, you wanted to know what we (I) thought...
First, it seemed like much was accomplished in this chapter. Very eventful. And it ended with suspense!
A few things I thought could be improved in this chapter are that it was kind of vague when they met V in the hall after fighting the guards, they (guards) had him but it wasn't explained. Just another thing to be implied!
I also thought that perhaps too many things happened in this chapter, but perhaps it had to happen that way.
I noticed a lot of character development in this chapter. Great! The characters are already coming to life.
Great chapter. Great story so far!
| Kyre Crow chapter 6 . 6/12/2010
This chapter seemed somewhat uneventful. Despite that, quite a bit has been introduced and leaves us wanting more. (goes and reads next chapter) Just wanted to review. Good job!
| Sirens And Muses chapter 7 . 6/6/2010
Siren: Awesome! My favorite's Teo. Snakes are always such smartasses.
Muse: I really like this story. It's brilliantly written and has interesting twists.
Siren: In other words, UPDATE!
| Sammyjon123 chapter 7 . 6/6/2010
That was pretty intense o-o I was worried when M kept wanting, or actively trying, to kill people, but I guess he WAS designed as the perfect soldier. Though it wasn't a pleasant wait, I understand why this one took so long. Good chapter!
| Tilly of Silly chapter 6 . 5/23/2010
I really like this as I think I said before. I like a lot of things but I'm always to lazy to reply. I really like this and the development in the plot is wonderful. I can't wait to hear Vs reply. Though I did guess that V was Cohryn's son. That was a very nice subtle to hint. Though the shock might have been better without it. It might have been better to wait until V opened up to A but whatever it doesn't really have any effect on the wuality of the story. I'm really enjoying this. And I'm glad you've been updating consistently. That's a blessing in itself. Can't wait for more!
-Tilly of Silly
| Sammyjon123 chapter 6 . 5/22/2010
This is great! There are a few typo's, but that's the only flaw I can see. The descriptions, characters and the plot itself are amazing. I'd say my favorite character by far is Sub. M, simply because he confuses people right from his introduction in a far less evil way than Cohryn.
I'll be really sad if you stop writing this, as I was hooked into it as soon as I started reading.
| Kyre Crow chapter 5 . 5/17/2010
Wow... really? This story is just amazing. Really. The introduction of Cohryn... Cohryn and V's geniusness...
It's really brilliant, the way you can make Subject A unique in so many ways and yet not more powerful etc. and Mary-Sue-ish (for those of you wondering, way too perfect characters can be called Mary-Sues) than the other characters. She has a realistic personality and that's what I think is so great about her.
Overall, amazing story. Keep it up!
| owlsblood chapter 4 . 5/15/2010
okay, you must know by now that you are added to my favorite authors list and you still continue to write fantastic things! sweet moon, I'm jelous, oh and have you ever listened to the band Morningwood? They have really interesting stuff, though I'm not sure if they would help with this particular story. I love you Scarlet Tango! Keep writing please!
| Kyre Crow chapter 3 . 5/6/2010
Yay! I mean, a little hart to follow in places, but brilliant characters and the plot is definitely getting better. Keep writing!