Reviews for Destined to Destroy
Asrialth chapter 7 . 10/28/2010
Hi there!

Gosh I keep loving this story more and more. The way you describe everything, I love it! Though Mira might be just a little bit clueless about her own feelings, I guess. But that is probably something that is normal for a girl like her :P

I don't like it though that she didn't even notice Tella being ill... That is not something that a friend should do. But she has a lot on her mind too.

And I love Teivel! :P

Keep writing, You've got me hooked!

X

As
SASE1 chapter 1 . 6/29/2010
I think you are a fabuluas writer, really. I just think you are layering it a bit thick with the mistrust though. I consider myself a misanthrope, and I never really have thoughts about not trusting people. I personally usally avoid people, so you got that part right. I also like how you didn't keep saying things like how spiteful misanthropes are. I Personelly, I don't think about not trusting people, nor do I think about hating people. You also got her annoyence right. I usaully get annoyed at people for even the little things.
Linguistic chapter 4 . 6/21/2010
Wonderful story, well written, even if the hell bit is a bit cliched.

Still, it's really, really good. I think the only thing I'm unsure of this whether 'good' humans go to hell and get destroyed as well?
Asrialth chapter 4 . 5/19/2010
Hey,

this is a very nice story! Your writing style is funny and quick and it makes one want to read it. You have a nice sense of humor too.

Only one thing: sometimes you shift from present time to past tense while the story should be written in one tense. Just something to keep you thinking about.

All in all, this is a very nice story.

X

Eine aka Asrialth
Nuhjookule chapter 3 . 5/16/2010
Really thoughtful, really funny... Please do update soon! I'd love to see more from you! Hugs and kisses! Nuhjookule
Paerydise Eden Green chapter 1 . 4/24/2010
this was funny kinda. teivel. i like that name. this is very interesting can't wait till you update.
Nuhjookule chapter 1 . 4/24/2010
Great! It's been awhile since I've read anything decent on this site (lol!), so thanks for the nice change in pace. Therefore, you deserve a "technical" review (the kind I rarely give out anymore)! I'll try and make it quick, though. First off, I love Mira! She's definitely a three-dimensional character thus far into the story (also love the Spanish "Mira!" reference, lol). She's realistic in that she isn't a) the peppy, upbeat girl everybody likes, b) the Goth or "emo" girl who hates life, or c) the girl who thinks she's tough but ends up needing rescuing by dashing heroes every five seconds (popular stereotypical character types). She's very natural in that she's not a huge people-person but she has a sense of self-worth and she makes intelligent observations of the world around her. She's a nice blend that I don't think we find much anymore in unpublished fiction. You combine humor nicely and smoothly within your prose while still keeping up with the actions and emotions of the characters. To be a bit critical, you have just a few cliches in your language (e.g. phrases and words that have been used before by other writers), and there's a bit of useless dialogue that can be summarized or removed. I suggest: When writing prose, if you've heard a phrase or descriptor before, don't use it and make up your own. Your writing will improve tenfold! Also: Only use dialogue when something about plot, character, or emotion is gained through it. Otherwise, summarizing can have a more powerful and dynamic effect! That's just some advice my creative writing teacher always tells me, so I'm passing it on to you because you actually have potential (lol). Overall, I think you've got a great start here, I really enjoyed reading it!

Oh, that wasn't short at all... . Sorry! (But when I see a good story with lots of potential, I can't help but write a lot about it... *u*) Anyway, I love what you have, so please keep writing! I wanna see you improve! Hugs and kisses and blah-blah-blah! Nuhjookule