Reviews for Chasing Mr Darcy
ayojess chapter 1 . 5/25/2010

I don't' know what that means, it just felt right to say. ;)

This was cute. I love how you spinned the whole pride and prejudice cliche. And I love both Laura. Mickey, not so much when he was a snotty brat, but lovely when he matured. The only bad thing would be his horrible cocky attitude when he basically assumed she would fall into his arms. The feminist in me hated it- the other part loved it. :)

Keep writing!
Raux chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
Holy crap. This was good. This was real good. Scratch that. This was FANTASTIC.

I almost cried. I don't know why, but I almost did. I think I'm PMSing at the moment, so I'm a bit a emotional. That might be it. XD

But man, Vena. That was so sweet and cute and real and incredibly well written. You should be very proud of this. I know you don't have the time and all that, but you should really try and write more.

My gosh...

Fresh Harvest chapter 1 . 5/25/2010

First, I only really caught one typo, but here it is:

"It is difficult for me to imagine Mikey doing these things, but at the same it is not."

-" the same time it is not."

Second-I was afraid this story would be setting me up drastically only for a gigantic fall that would prove utterly disappointing, but that hasn't been the case at all. This was so truly heartwarming. :)

I wasn't sure how I felt at the beginning, because both Laura's gigantic crush on Mikey and Mikey's gigantic crush on Lizzie embarrassed me and made me cringe. (I don't know how to describe it-it's not that I genuinely found them repulsive, but they did make me squirm a bit for Laura and Mikey.) And I generally don't like stories where the girl is the one aggressively pursuing an indifferent guy, because... I don't know. So maybe I'm a little bit traditional that way.

And well, I would definitely have benefited from a more conclusive happy ending. But I was prepared because you said this was different both from TDISH and S. I can deal with the ending fine because it looks like it's going to be really happy-but I wish I could share with them in their happy moments and read about them! Haha.

Not that I'm necessarily saying you should have written it differently. Those are all things that I would have liked to see, but I realise they would change the fundamental structure of your story. And, well-it's pretty awesome as it stands.

I'm glad Mikey finally kind of gets a clue at the end, though. And that despite all the awkward moments and awful things that had happened (the scene when Laura tried to initiate sex with Mikey and then hated herself/him for it made me really cringe with pain), Laura and Mikey remained good friends throughout. There really was more to them than just childhood infatuation.

I loved that, despite all the awkward moments and everything, I was always rooting for Laura and Mikey. You wrote your characters well, woman. :)

Haha I'm so curious! I really want a continuation! But I will learn to be satisfied.

I'm so glad to finally see more writing from you. And urge you to write more. ;)

All the best!
Removed01 chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
Ooh, curious. The general structure looks like it's made out of short paragraphs. I do that too! Later I read somewhere that this format looks less intimidating and more amiable for readers. Score one for us.

Now, reviewing as I read:

holding my dainty pink diary.- *imagines it to be Hello Kitty X3*

Looks like Washington but it's called Canada. Lol, don't let hockey fans hear that. Oh, talking about hockey. I see a mention there. *heart*

Her thoughts about boobies are so funny; adorable and slightly sad too, since she wants to grow them up fast to get Mikey's attention. Ah, childhood. Hits some people harder than others...

So far her dad hasn't said a word and he's already funny. Aww, "Daddy, Mommy is a babe, right?" Aw! S2

What a dumb sport.- How my heart breaks. Although hers broke harder after that little playing session.

LOL at Mikey's cousin comment.


Ahahahaha omg, hahaha. He pulled his pants down. *facepalms* Kids. Leave them alone for a second and look.

*Whistle* So, Pride and Prejudice...

with much emphasis on the bulges.- I know someone who has a thing for bulges. Haha.

Whoa, what a meltdown the almost-sex part was. A very ouch inducing moment. I feel for her, although I can’t feel against Mikey. You can’t help who you like/get obsessed with.

I am becoming older and wiser while Mikey is becoming younger and, well, less wiser.— That is what happens normally, hence the popular and scientific opinion that women are more mature than men their age. We *had* to have something going for us, after getting the short stick so many times, geez.

It’s refreshing and interesting to read about characters of whom one of them knows the other has a thing for him; I don’t think that’s something we usually find—or something I have read much of.

I mark the end of our torrent one-sided love affair.—Shouldn’t it be torrid?

*Eyes go wide as saucers* Yoo, Mikey chose his stage well, damn, fine well.

A’ight. It’s done. I don’t know if I liked more their Mr. Pork and Mrs. Ham conversation (and the fact that he refused Cornell for NYU... shit, how did he get funded for both? Hockey? Someone should’ve told me this and I would have taken it up when I was a kid... No, that wouldn’t have worked... Damn it all, femalehood and distance!), or his letter. It was a somewhat open ending, but I liked it. It’s a promise, not a farewell.

And hah! He wrote two letters in the end. Work hard, Mikey!

As for foods that look like vajayjays, heh-heh-heh...

Best Wishes from AG
mgouda chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
this was possibly the cutest story i have ever read on fictionpress.

i'm so, so speechless, so completely heart-warmed with the way everything played out. i can't describe to you the vivid emotions i felt reading this, the very real sense of happiness it gave me. and that's something rare and quiet beautiful, to be able to evoke such startling responses from readers.

wonderful, wonderful job. and that's really all i have to say.
WishBlade chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
I like the writing style-when she was 5, your writing made her sound like a 5 year old, when she was 10, she sounded like a 10 year old, when she was 15, she sounded 15. It was very well written, and I absolutely adore the ending...and just this story in general ] Thanks for posting!
Slaaty chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
Thank you for this insanely obese one-shot. I love the irony in the names, and the phallic references throughout. Laura is the sweetest thing.. and you are just super! )
dramalover21 chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
Ah! I loved it! It reminded me so much of what those childhood years were like. Especially the kid and pre-teen years. And, Mikey proving himself to be a boy at Lizzie's graduation, I haven't had that good of a laugh in a really long time! This one-shot was very well written! Keep up the good work!
AmandaHold chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
i absolutely adored this story! i loved how you chose to write it. my favorite part was when mikey read his letter at graduation. i liked the references to pride and prejudice too.
effervescent-sentiments chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
Vena! This was great! Fantastic work! Noticed improvement (as in, complete fixing) with your syntax - all good, all good. :)

Where to start. I hate reviewing. I liked your main character a lot - she was unabashed and unafraid. I love when I like female MCs - it doesn't happen often anymore.

I think I especially liked the "life lessons" attached to this. I just graduated on saturday and read the commencement address and really admired mikey's speech - unexpected and clever. This piece was intelligent, but also had the typical elements of sweetness in a "typical" chick-lit. A good balance. I think what I liked best was the way that Laura was legitimately ready to move on. Even if mikey hadn't run after her, she would have been okay. That is an important addition, because it made Laura seem far more rational (not to mention feminist versus 50s housewife) than a typical romance heroine. It was refreshing, exactly what FP needs, and realistic. The ending wasn't saccharine. It was genuine sugar.

Also loved the similes you used for five-year-old Laura. So effing perfect.

I think the only issue I had was how abruptly mikey became a genius. I was picturing him as a total jock. Maybe make him a little geekier and it won't seem like such a convenience that he ended up brilliant. That's just my opinion. :)

Again, great work. Keep writing!

Sorrow's Smile chapter 1 . 5/25/2010


scarletfleur chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
:) that was really very good, and extremely funny

my favourite part was when mikey read his graduation letter out. but the time when he did his im too sexy dance is a severe rival.

laura's a great character - very forward! :) very refreshing
MaeMaes chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
:D You know how much I love this. I've gushed all over gchat about it to you. I do have to say that I hate FP for not letting you put in a period in the title, lol. But, anyway! Much love. Awesome writing, and I'm so happy for you about this. :) Seriously. Wonderful job! S2 S2
Le Meg chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
Super super cute. I love the format you have for this, and the way the voice changes as Laura gets older. Very well executed. Laura wasn't exactly shameless, but I love how honest her character was and how realistic her and Mikey's friendship was. Everybody remembers their childhood crushes, and everybody remembers how embarrassing they could be. Kids have no censors, they don't understand playing hard to get, and I felt like that was definitely channeled here.

The fact that there wasn't any big, dramatic get together at the end made me happy-they're still friends before everything else and I like that you emphasized that. If there's romance after, that's just bonus points. :)
StarryEyedStranger chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
I genuinely can't say enough how much this one-shot appealed to me, gaah, so good.
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