Reviews for Adam and Eve
ZyggyGirl chapter 1 . 6/27/2010
Haunting...I honestly felt a little chill at the ending. There was something surreal about the way you wrote this piece. I could almost feel the unity and fear as they prepared for death.
pretty twisted chapter 1 . 6/27/2010
Gorgeous imagery all throughout and really fantastic idea. The last line was an absolutely perfect closing. The only things I noticed were a tense changes a few times and the sentences that ranDUMM pointed out, but other than that it was beautifully written. Adam and Eve were great name choice. :)
Mandisaurus-rex chapter 1 . 6/23/2010
Wow, this is such a good story! And a really creative idea too! I don't have any criticism...I just really, really enjoyed it ). Great job Dex!
ranDUMM chapter 1 . 6/22/2010
Hey,

What a brilliant concept! I loved the fact that you had them as the last ones to lie on earth. It was a really awesome touch :) I thought that you wrote it really well as well; it was really believable and the descriptions were really beautiful. There were a few mistakes. I pointed out a few; just reading over it will often get rid of them :)

- "She tried to keep the noise of her sobs to a minimum so she wouldn't disturb the creatures lurking in the shadows outside." Not an error, but I just thought that this was a bit awkward to read, a slightly run on sentence, that's all.

- "The predators would rip anything that even moves into pieces," I felt like this sentence wasn't structured correctly. I had to read it over a few times to understand, because I felt like you'd suddenly jumped from one tense to another.

A really, really awesome piece Dex, keep it up! :)

ranDUMM
Chromcoff chapter 1 . 6/22/2010
That was freaking savage, and good too. I don't actually have any criticism, it was just good. :D
Shuna chapter 1 . 6/22/2010
I liked this very much. It is a funny thought that the last human beings on Tellus was named Adam and Eve. And that we didn't truly know who made these creatures.

I didn't find any mistakes, so well done :)

Love Shuna
EmmaHarkness chapter 1 . 6/21/2010
Wow...This was really fantastic. It was so dark and deep, and I loved every bit of it. Its one of those stories that really make you think. I loved every bit of it, ecspeccially the whole Adam and Eve thing (which is sort of ironic, considering I'm atheist, but I do know the story, so whatever...). Again, I loved the story so much. It was amazingly brilliant :)