|Reviews for Taking Sides|
| Doc Grant chapter 8 . 7/24/2010
Another enjoyable chapter. Poor Devon, no wonder he was so freaked out when Parker kissed him. Seth seems like a huge asshole, but considering the environment in which he was raised, it might be hard to blame him completely.
I will say I found the whole Devon and Seth scene a bit random, and it seemed out of place with Devon's feelings in earlier chapters. I'm not sure if I'd call someone who practically forced themselves on me then punched me when I tried to resist my best friend. But Devon is a bit odd, ha ha, and I certainly think it's plausible he might still be confused about the whole situation. In any event it was certainly an interesting twist, and it leads the story in a direction I was not expecting. I look forward to seeing what you plan to have happen next, especially concerning Parker and whatever he's feeling now. You have not disappointed yet, and I doubt you shall.
| Sailor Muffins chapter 8 . 7/24/2010
Firstly, before I review, I’d like to say that I’ve read all the chapters in this story so far, but I have not decided to review until now. I hope you don’t mind one long review as opposed to many short reviews.
Now, to begin: I like your writing. There are a few errors here and there, but overall you have more control over the language than some others I’ve seen. You have a nice flow and style that keeps the interest easily, so you should be proud of that.
As for the story: I feel that it’s good. I’ve seen a few hiccups in there that seem random and out of place. The biggest examples I can think of are Park and Devon’s kiss, and Seth’s attack on Devon. There was little foreshadowing to the Parker/Devon event, and I feel that the scene it was executed in was kind of awkward. The Seth/Devon thing just took me by complete surprise, and not necessarily in a good way. Devon had seemed to not mention it very much, if at all, and one would think he would feel differently about something that big. I think I’m most disappointed by your sudden change of pace. The story was slowly rolling along and developing just fine… then bam, Parker and Devon suck face. But, other than that, you really do have a talent for keeping the subplots and plot moving concurrently. That is pretty big to me, since I see so many others crash as burn. All the main characters are important and three dimensional in their own way. Kudos to you on that, you earn my respect.
The rest of the complaints I have are really nitpicks… I found the French annoying at first, but once you introduced Parker’s lineage a little better, I understood why. From what little understanding of the French language I have, you seem to at least know how to write it out well. Sometimes, I see stuff like this and it’s obviously translated via online translator; use of those unintelligently is very bad.
One thing that kind of stood out to me was some of the antagonists you’ve introduced. I feel like sometimes you try too hard to make them villainous when they would make much better as rivals of sorts. I suppose they just came off as overly dramatic and evil, which seems a little unrealistic. The murder conversation at the dinner table was just the icing on that cake, really.
Speaking of realism… I find it hard to believe that a family would uproot their lives just like that because someone they knew was gay. It seems rather impossible to avoid homosexuality completely, no matter how strict the Catholicism in the household may be. I also found the family’s reaction at that meal a bit on the ridiculous side, but that’s probably because I’m more reserved than they had displayed.
Anyway, I think that’s about it. I’d like to say that I really enjoy this story overall. You are quite talented. I almost wish you would get more attention for this. I apologize if anything I said in this review seemed unfair or mean. I only criticize because I care.
Keep it up.
| Madame Penguin chapter 7 . 7/17/2010
You don't know how many times I said hell yeah when Parker finally kissed Devon. Yeah they hardly know each other but you got to admit that was great.
I think it would be so cool if they decided to ignore their feelings for now as Devon slowly harbors these unknown feelings until he finally embraces them. In the meantime during school, he takes French and learns how to speak it by staying at Parker's house for long periods of time. I just think that would be priceless.
I love how he panics. It seems so real and I love the melodrama main characters create, especially if they are christian related though catholics are the main persecutors. I don't know how this is going to end up but i can't wait.
Oh please ignore the shy girl. I could only bare it if Devon would fake the feelings but not do anything with her, even if his sister begs. It just doesn't seem right to me knowing he would be playing with her heart.
| Doc Grant chapter 7 . 7/17/2010
And so now the drama truly starts. Good chapter. Try as he might, I don't think Devon will be able to avoid Parker for long, if only because Skye seems like she'd get suspicious. Right now, Devon might actually want his parents to forbid him from seeing Parker. But sooner or later he'll have to face him again, and that's when things should really get intense. I also thought Devon deceiving Skye at the end of the chapter was a nice touch. It nicely showcases the increasing isolation he's probably feeling.
Keep it up. This is one of the best stories on here, IMO. And the only one I bother to review, XD.
| Doc Grant chapter 6 . 7/12/2010
Poor Sadie. I have to admit, up until this chapter he was probably one of my least favorite characters in this story. I still have not completely warmed up to him, but it looks like he now has a bit of a justification for why he's been such an insufferable ass to Parker and Skye.
One thing I really like about this story is how adept you are at juggling different plotlines. The tension between Parker and Devon may be one of my favorite aspects of the story, but you don't neglect the other characters. I'm curious about Sadie's past and how Parker ties into it,not to mention the mysterious Seth, but I also am wondering what you plan for Skye and her boyfriend. It's nice to read a story where other characters are not just there, but have their own desires and conflicts, rather than just serving as foils to either help or hinder the main characters.
Anyway, keep it up. This story improves with every chapter
| Madame Penguin chapter 6 . 7/12/2010
oh the awful sunburn of doom...i met it the first time last week. I now know that a sunburn hurts like a bitch so good luck...do you have a fever or something? If so rubbing alcohol on your body usually cures it in one day!
wow talk about drama llama, nothing is ever calm around them huh? especially with that shocking hug from Skye! good job on the womanly characteristics that everything can be solved with a hug and a sob fest though i don't think it worked this time.
Oh the suspense is killing me and i can't wait til the next chapter. I would be ever so smitten once when those...people...get a taste of their own medicine for once
| ThatBlondeGirl chapter 6 . 7/12/2010
Poor Sadie...no wonder he never talks! Stupid "holier-than-thou" headmistress and her children! (I'm not blaming the dad, because he did try to change the topic lol) but really, ugh! I have a feeling those two Catholic brats are going to be causing a heck of a lot more problems for Devon, Sadie, Parker, and Skye...anyways, this was a really good chapter (: very insightful! And I would like to hear Sadie's side of the drowning story :) update soon!
| Doc Grant chapter 5 . 7/8/2010
One of my favorite chapters so far. I'm curious as to the nature of Sadie and Parker's relationship. It appears that Sadie feels something for Parker that Parker might not for him, which might explain Sadie's dislike for poor Devon. Whatever the case, it seems like there will be much angst to come, especially if Parker does pursue Devon. Given that I like angst, I encourage this development,heh.
Keep it up. This is a really enjoyable story.
| ThatBlondeGirl chapter 5 . 7/7/2010
this is a really good story so far :) your characters are really cool, though i must admit, Sadie is my favorite at the moment. i'm not sure why, either lol d: there were a few grammar mistakes i noticed, but other than that, awesome :) update soon
| Madame Penguin chapter 4 . 7/6/2010
woah Sadie! Cool your horses sheesh -at-Everything...
At least it's only the summer because if it was the school year and Devon had met those trio first...just imagine him being stuck in that clique ew
Gosh why aren't people reviewing this! I love it so much but I guess there aren't as many chapters as they want yet XP
btw do you have a beta for this? every once in a while i do find a grammar mistake or two but not many, just wanted to know.
Will we ever meet Seth or Adam?
| Doc Grant chapter 4 . 7/3/2010
This story continues to be captivating. You've set up several interesting conflicts, both with Devon and Skye's family, as well as their new classmates. I have a feeling Devon will be less then popular with most of the town's residents so long as he's perceived as being friendly or tolerant towards Parker and Sadie. And of course, his family's reaction should be interesting as well. I'm not sure where exactly you intend to take this plotwise, but it looks like it will be a good story either way. Keep it up!
| Madame Penguin chapter 3 . 7/1/2010
Oh god! Bad memories...stupid Catholics and their judgemental ways gr! Seriously if I met someone like that family, I would need someone to hold me back before I stat strangling them or shout random bible verses back at them. I mean seriously like one day I was sitting down it the meditation pose for yoga and this Catholic walks by and starts telling me that Buddhism is not the right religion and I'm a sinner.
Good job there with Devon. I like how he has actual morals outside his religion and knows when it is too much and how wrong it is to be so discrimitory. Are the guys in the booth Parker and Sadie? If not then I guess there's more to love haha.
Oh gosh that last message you put on made me smile so much! I didn't realize that I made your day like that but I don't understand why more people aren't reviewing! I love this so far and you have gave me such a great beginning without even giving me the whole story yet...can't wait til the next chappie!
| Doc Grant chapter 3 . 6/30/2010
I love this story so far. Your characterization is great and believable, and from what I've seen of the plot it has the potential to get very interesting. I like Parker, and it should be interesting to see how Devon and Skye react to him as they get to know him better, given his... differences.
Great story, and I look forward to seeing where you're planning on taking it.
| Madame Penguin chapter 2 . 6/28/2010
Secretive, secretive...Must all you authors torture us so dearly? Guess we wont find out til way later in the story I bet!
oh it would be grand if the tension got so high one day that Devon decides to split the joint and run away. It was hardly one or two sentences but I hate it when people correct me on my behavior by using God. I mean I don't mind it at church but if you preach it to me every other day...
It seems like Devon only accepts being Catholic because that was how he was raise and doesn't know anything outside that. Hope Parker can knock some sense into him(I mean I'm christian but some catholics are just crazy I swear. I know this because I was raised that way)
| Madame Penguin chapter 1 . 6/26/2010
Hm I have a feeling that Devon is one of those types that are quiet around new people but won't shut up when you know him well enough. With religion in the mix, I bet this is going to turn into a real interesting story. You just know how to make it hard on yourself by putting him into an all boys school huh? Especially if Parker is the guy he is going to end up with maybe haha. Update soon!