Reviews for Without Light
Guest chapter 25 . 7/19/2011
i hope estelle gets to live i am really interested to know how all this plays out

you have created a wonderful mythology and memorable creatures

oh i thought the saying was all of a sudden not all of the sudden either way you couod just write suddenly thats sufficeient also when you rewrite i wastired of all of those pretty pink lips sheesh

what about pouty lips or moist lips or glistening lips pr pillowy lips? pink lips sound like porn to me since i myself dont have pink lips on my face lol
laurenexplorin chapter 1 . 7/19/2011
this story seems very good just by reading the first chapter! i will read the rest later :)
Guest chapter 23 . 7/19/2011
i guess heathers father leaving them screwed her up

makes me mad that she has no real plans for her life

letting kuro use her is all she wants

she thinks of herself as an object

she was brave and rebellious at the beginning

now she is just a surly spoiled pet
Liveey123348 chapter 1 . 7/18/2011
"Hikaru" huh? hmm that name reminds me of UTADA Hikaru a japanese singer, I love Kingdom hearts~ 3 and you know what? This story seems VERY interesting~; Ill enjoy reading it~

Kaitlyn

K.I.T

Xoxo
Guest chapter 22 . 7/18/2011
tiny typo Noble , the word alone could encompass or the word alone encompassed still enjoying the story cant wait until heather finds out chris is alive love kintra to pieces lol
Guest chapter 20 . 7/18/2011
i am outraged at the killing of this child

nobody saw that coming

midori is stupid she doesnt know what she is doing

i like faye

its nice for heather to have someone else to interact with besides kuro and kintra./

chris is so irrational these days

what happened to estelle was disgusting i will never forgive kintra for not protecting estelle
Guest chapter 16 . 7/18/2011
pavedroads unpaved themselves- pure poetry

i enjoyed this scene it was quite a spectacle you painted for us. i have never read anything this exciting in my whole history of reading
Guest chapter 14 . 7/17/2011
this is wonderful, finally

excellent writing and excellent storytelling

very interesting wolf quenn added to the storyline. i am excited and eager to read this new developement
Guest chapter 13 . 7/17/2011
i love your writing skills

but i really dont like love stories

i find the scenes between heather and kuro tedious and pointless

i dont even care what eastelle is too muych emphasis on white skin this and beautiful that yep this is def for teenagers.

the 3 some with kintra disturbs me because everybody is so vague and it all seems so pointless to me

i want them to do their mission and find the ruby weapon i want more action and not bedroom action

i want more revelations as to dragon interaction and purpose

it was somewhat helpful to have the dragons slip some tidbits of info to heather
Guest chapter 12 . 7/17/2011
well i made it this far.
Guest chapter 8 . 7/16/2011
yes we do need a lexicon. i do get confused by the diff critters names

this is a violent world, esp dangerous to deliver letters poor kitty critter

i was thinking an angel would be nice amidst all the ugliness and evil

i like how estelle fixed the necklace and helped chris to not feel alone sweetness and goodness is not gender bound

you didntm tell me the necklace was black lace.i would have bought a piece before i strung the stone .oh and heather is ME ha ha
Guest chapter 6 . 7/16/2011
nope didnt cheer me up

this town has plenty of sights but no smells{food shops} lol

at least found some females in the shoe store

that was anice visual image wouldnt mind going to one like that with shoes that were magic

do the pets have to provide sex for their owners? yuck

i was right behind heather as she ran outta there

anyway her eyes are not plain brown

brown is not plain, it's beautiful and warm
Guest chapter 5 . 7/16/2011
now i have better understanding of chris and heather's purpose in the palace.

very curious of what and how they will learn the vital secrets .

cant help but wonder what life must be like for the humans in this world.

i wish they could go home.

i hope te end of this story the humans get to leave this world forever!
Ramar chapter 25 . 7/12/2011
Awesome end to book 1! But it's left me wanting more...and so much more is revealed!

Okay, so...now I'm gonna have a guess. The old gods are going to be replaced by newer ones...? Kuro replaces Kuroi (fixes Hikaru and Kuro's problem, that), Selenia replaces Midori, Lucas replaces the leopard queen, and Cereno replaces Mura (if he does get killed by Kuro...) A new generation of gods! With Heather as Haku! hehehe...

And it would definitely be sad if Selenia is killed for possessing Haku's powers (and that explains her close resemblance to Heather...). I don't want Estelle killed either! No! Unless his soul could be kept somewhere and put into another body...is there any other magic in the Shiren world that could possibly do this? Coz Chris is already torn up inside over losing Estelle...

...Chris can wield leopard magic? Does that mean any other humans that are strays can also do so? Coz that would be so cool! A whole human army of magical blood wielders! I can totally see it...Unless it's only possible with leopard blood...

And if only Heather could persuade Kuro to let her go and leave with her...and for Kintra to leave with Midi...but I guess that's not possible because that'd be too good to be true...So I suppose the most likely thing to happen is for Midi to get killed by Kintra and...woah...that'd mean Selenia'd inherit the throne...but she's under Kuroi's hands at the moment...bad, that would be...bad...

Now, I can't wait for the books to come out! And I wish you luck in finding a publisher. I hope it won't be too hard ] And I'm awfully glad that you did put this last chapter up...
ShortcakeMattie chapter 25 . 7/11/2011
FictionPress says I already wrote a review for this chapter so I can't post again. I can't believe it's the last chapter already. It feels like only yesterday I started reading it.

Anyway... on to the chapter! :)

-

He kept leaning too close, and so for the fifth time Chris had to him away, muttering.

Edit: I think you meant to put "push" between "...Chris had to [push] him away, muttering."

-

"I might later..." Lucas mumbled, absently catching one of Christian's earrings between his lips. Chris was fun to play with. He always had something shiny dangling somewhere on his pretty little body. "Can I-"

"No."

Lucas whined, wordlessly, but didn't seem willing to push it.

"Where's Cereno anyway?" Chris wondered, "Isn't it his job to keep you all cozy and warm?" - Oh Lucas. I am going to miss your antics very much.

-

Aw. Such a touching moment between Chris and Lucas. You capture Chris's emotions on Estelle well. I can feel his pain and guilt. Poor guy.

-

"But it's different! He doesn't love her! She's human!"

"And you're a dog."

...Um. Ouch. Kintra's a little harsh, but he has a point. I see both sides of the situation, but I think I agree with Kintra on this one.

-

Absently she reached up to banish her showing wolf ears, but Kintra only caught her in his arms and stood on his toes to kiss each one, causing his new canine wife to blush fuirously

Edit: ...causing his new canine wife to blush furiously.

-

"Yes… Those soft red lips whispered against his own, soothing like nothing he'd ever felt, and Kintra screwed his eyes shut, listening instead of trying to read her mind.

Edit: "Yes..." Those soft red lips whispered against his own...

-

He dind't know she was supposed to leave soon with Midori, or that she'd talked to Faye about marks and even thought of accepting one from him.

Edit: He didn't know she was supposed...

-

"Shoudln't you already know, anyway? You can smell stuff like that right?"

Edit: "Shouldn't you already know, anyway? You can smell stuff like that, right?"

So that's what you why you were asking whether or not she should be pregnant. Makes more sense now. It would be interesting if she was, but I don't know how maternal Heather really is.

-

"I only haveone wife," was the other's shame-filled response.

Edit: "I only have one wife," was the other's shame-filled response.

-

Lucas lagged a little behind, watching his newly excited companion. "I think we created a monster."

Cereno chuckled. "You created a monster."

Glad to see Lucas and Cereno are joking around again. :)

-

"I swear I didn't-"

"Liar" It was more a hiss than a word, and he refused even to turn back around and look at Heather.

Edit: "Liar."

-

"Look, I don't care about any of this magical crap or Ruby Weapon or anything! Everyonetold me to leave while you were asleep but I didn't!"

Edit: "...Everyone told me to leave while you were asleep but I didn't!"

-

I didn't want to believe you'd pull a cliffhanger. But you did. Dang it. That was evil... but well done. Hope my review was helpful... but not as much as I hope to see Without Light in bookstores soon. I want to find out what happens next!

-Mattie
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