|Reviews for Without Light|
| ShortcakeMattie chapter 23 . 6/19/2011
"I certainly won't be needing it," Kintra spoke as if her were finally admitting that to himself, fter many long years
Edit: Kintra spoke as if he were finally admitting that to himself, after many long years.
"No, they're just decoration if you cant take your smaller moth form so, yeah, just decoration…"
Edit: "No, they're just decoration if you can't take your smaller moth form so, yeah, just decoration..."
I'm glad Chris is alive. :) Fay makes me laugh. I like her a lot.
The scene between Kintra and Midori was cute, especially the part where the rose petals fell from her hair.
"I swear I keep seeing white wolves…"
"Heh." Faye patted her kindly on the back. "Don't worry. We're all a little bit nutty."
"Yeah but I'm like, extra nutty. I hear voices too, just so you know."
"Hardcore! Do they tell you to burn the place down?"
"That's what mine would say," Faye assured. "Bet you anything."
Nothing wrong with this part. I just had to point it out because it's my favorite scene in this chapter. :)
"Alright, what're you t-Lucas why in the seven hells do you have to pull this dumb shit? The poor kid is injured, you brainless buttslut!"
"I am not," Lucas snorted, "Chris started it…"
"You're on top of him."
"Well he likes me 'cause I'm hot."
"Guilty as charged," Chris offered, causing Cereno's eyebrows to raise.
Ok. I lied. This is another favorite scene of mine.
Also poor Lucas. I really hope Cereno doesn't kill him. :(
Intense ending. Can't wait for the next chapter! :)
| Junie chapter 2 . 6/19/2011
So...this is how they got to the water! Very nice...I'm enjoying this journey!
| Junie chapter 1 . 6/19/2011
Can't wait to find out where they are taking her and why she is worth more without the bruises! Is she to become a pet? So glad she is not a candidate for a "wife!" Phew I was worried! Very good imagery...place seems smelly, drippy, dark...very disturbing. Still I wonder about Heather and her almost appreciation of the questions of eye color. She almost seemed to appreciate some(thing) noticing her eyes. I wonder if even with the fear of the unknown upon her, is she a bit relieved to be somewhere, anywhere other than where she was...
Great chapter Crys!
| Hunko11 chapter 3 . 6/19/2011
This was very good as we it really helps the story fall into place. You have really good grammer for writing. Have you ever thought about publishing your book I know I would buy it
| Rukis Lakeru chapter 4 . 6/18/2011
The world you've created is just so wonderful! I mean I love chimeras, and I can perfectly imagine every awesome creature thtat's described on the story so far. I just wish this universe was actually real D:
The characters are just lovely (and I mean ieveryone/i 3 ), being Chris my favourite *_* And I think I'll like this Lucas-guy in the future ;D
Sadly, This is all I can say so far about the story, since I haven't read th rest of the chapters yet. But as soon as I read the next lot, I'll leave another, hopefully better review, I'm that excited about this :D
One thing I have to note: There's a fragment on this chapter that seems to be duplicated: The one with Mirah and the Queen of Wolves ' I got a little confused at first, but then I checked the frgaments and were the same. I can't tell you exactly where is it, since I can't quite remember right now xD I just know it's about those two :)
Anyway, this story is just great! :D I promise to continue reading tomorrow 3 Now I have to sleep 3 Take care, Miss Crystalynn~! Have a nice day/noon/night ;P
| AliceKKT chapter 1 . 6/18/2011
I actually read the whole story so this review is meant for the 23 chapters.
I think it's beautiful.
It is very sweet.
You definitely have a wonderful talent.
You brought the characters to life.
I couldn't stop reading it.
Your words definitely have meaning in them.
At first, I thought Chris and Hiraku would fall in love.
The way you introduced your characters, your different points of view, your creativity, it was all very amazing.
I actually felt like I was reading a best-selling author's book.
At times, yes, you did get go a little off-track, but I you definitly didn't make it obvious with the beautiful writing surrounding it.
I would love to read the rest of it.
I especially like how Hiraku is going to tourture Kuroshi.
I will say this again once more, you are very talented.
I think it's a beautiful story :)
| Hunko11 chapter 2 . 6/18/2011
The story just gets better I think its sad that her dad indeed. At the begging when they were reading the books and laughing a lot it reminded me of when I was a little kid and my dad would make me laugh my mom wasn't to happy about it. You leave awesome cliff hangers at the end and it makes readers want to read on. Great job
| Hunko11 chapter 1 . 6/18/2011
It is a very interesting story something no one has thought about reading I could feel every emotion that Heather was feeling and it mad me dislike snake and master a lot. I reay enjoyed it and cant wait to read more
| SnoFlakeGoddess chapter 23 . 6/16/2011
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGG YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING! why does it have to stop now? ITS SO GOOD! I cant wait for the next chapter!
And omg all my favorite characters always die! this is the worst luck ever! Is she really dead? OMGGGG please post the next chapter soon!
ok fangirl moment over. sorry. anyway this chapter was totally awesome. One complaint is it was way too short! I always hate it when the chapter ends cuz I know its gonna be another week til i get to see more! but omg that's actually really nice of you cuz i know alot of stories that havent been updated in months! MONTHS!
What's with that? Your actually the only author i know who actually CARES that we're out here waiting!
I think I totally know what's going on with Lucas! And Heather too i bet! The same thing i bet!
And he said spirit bonds were way special like wedding rings! Does that mean Heather and Midori are married? LMAO that would be so great!
whoa this is long! sorry! I love your stories! Write more!
Ps. WRITE MOREEEEEEEEEEEEEE
| CaBlasch87 chapter 23 . 6/16/2011
absolutely loved this..took me two days to finish, lol. but good
| Ramar chapter 23 . 6/15/2011
Gosh, it is amazing how talented you are! And you have got my head spinning! Just amazing!
Kuroshi more powerful than his father? And without care? So the cycle has been repeating itself for so many years, with Haku's incarnation always falling for him...? And Selenia dies! Hm...no loss, that, I hope...although there will have to be a new heir to Midori's throne if she also dies. And is Lucas gaining the dead leopard queen's powers and is now the heir? And is Heather now going to transform into a Shiren all of a sudden, what with her sudden ability to smell others' scent. Or is it just caused by the moon cycle thingy? A lot of questions again... D
There is also something I noticed while halfway through the chapter. At one point, a young wolf Shiren is led...well, I'll just quote:
"What looked to be a much younger male wolf had caught Kintra before he could return indoors, and judging by the way he'd turned and the younger male followed, Kintra must have decided they should speak somewhere more private."
Later on, however...:
"This was it: the power of Ruby Weapon. How in the world had Kintra done this? Within seconds, with no struggle and no noise, he'd rendered a dragon Shiren defenseless and unconscious. But what did it mean? Why would he do such a thing?"
The wolf transformed into a dragon...just so you know ]
Anyways, it's sad that you'll be removing this from FP (I "heard"), but it's also a good thing so as not to have your work plagiarized by some selfish villain hoping to gain fame and...stuff...I really hope that when it's published, it would also be sold over here in Asia...Macau specifically...or Philippines... XD
| ominous sparkles chapter 22 . 6/12/2011
haha i have finally reached the final bit. you do not understand how long that took - bloody creative mind aren't you? haha well done! the jumps are much better than they were earlier on. as i thought they might.. well done! XP
| amuxchan chapter 10 . 6/12/2011
I think I end up starting everyone one of these reviews with an "Oh snap". I'm excited. Heather got bought by the red eyed dragon guy-who is a huge sadist. I don't always like Heather, sometimes her character pisses me off. But she doesn't have to always be likable I suppose. There's just parts where I'm thinking, "oh, shut up" Be being whiny and mouthy is who she is. As long as it doesn't carry out too much.
| amuxchan chapter 8 . 6/11/2011
AH! Chris is turning into an alien. haha, just kidding. Yeah, i think that would be pretty nice, being a pet. Somehow I think there's more foreboding downsides to being a pet than Chris sees. I'm all for the both of them ditching the plan Aki set up. I hope this isn't one of these stories where no one turns out to be an ally. At least one unexpected ally left would be nice.
| amuxchan chapter 6 . 6/11/2011
oh snap yo. finally signed in. Heather has two(?) potential love matches? Yeah! Lucas and Chris all the way. Heather has two potentials.