Reviews for Without Light
Ruadhan chapter 20 . 5/21/2011
The story was good as usual! (Although I still miss and worry about Estelle. ;m; )

However you had a lot more errors (spelling wise) then usual. Did you use a different program? It seemed pretty rushed due to the errors but the content was as awesome as usual. XD;; I admit being tempted to scroll past Lucas and friends in hopes of some news of Estelle but I read them obediently as well.
Ramar chapter 20 . 5/20/2011
Wow...This chapter was so full of info. I understand how hard it must have been to writer it. Serena and Heather look the same? Does that mean...? So whatever happens to Serena, happens to Heather as well? Just like what happened with her dad and the queen? Curious...or is it that when Serena dies, Heather inherits Serena's powers, whatever they may be?

Well, this'll make Kuro's mission, if it can be called that, much easier, because of the incredible similarities between the two girls... :)
Kara P chapter 19 . 5/13/2011
Poor Estelle..and oh god..poor Kintra. D:

I hope they're both going to be ok..

AWESOME, but kinda sad, chapter. :)
Kara P chapter 18 . 5/13/2011
All I know is if a friend of mine acted like Chris did towards Heather Id probably punch them. xD

And can I keep Murasaki? D I love Luna moths~ -flails-
Jim chapter 2 . 5/13/2011
These characters are somewhat interesting, but I have a few problems with the storyline. Since beginning to read this chapter, I have encountered the following problems:

1: The main character is frequently referred to as Christian, but has made practically no effort to spread the Word of the Lord.

2: It is possible that your readers with large, bouncy bubble bottoms will find themselves feeling self-conscious when reading about his preference for flat women. Perhaps you could balance it out by having an exceptionally buxom foil for his character.

3: Drowsiness


Loss of appetite

A sprained ankle

A strained wrist

Stiffness and discomfort in the lower back

Also, my hair is going grey and your story has done nothing to alleviate it. Please address these plot problems as soon as possible.
thefaultinourpatronus chapter 1 . 5/10/2011
Love how it started, with a hint of mystery and an ominous past. Nice job.

"I'm sorry Hikaru. I love you. I truly do…"

-Comma between sorry and Hikaru required.

Heather seems like a good protagonist so far, I'd really like to see how she handles everything in the future.

Wording, articulation, vocab - all great!

Not a huge fan of fantasy with the exception of Harry Potter, but this definitely drew me in, I look forward to reading more!

x mandy
tvshowobsessed chapter 19 . 5/9/2011
Ohmygod. That was amazing. Again. :)

Chris and estelle were adorable (as always). But... The end... :O Poor Estelle... Evil king... He sounds horrible... I mean even more horrible than he sounded before... :/

And kuro at the beginning? Why does heather resist so much when she wants him? And the romantic bit.. Lol. How long does he hibernate for? Last time it wasn't very long...

:) can't wait for more. So good.
Kuronekowakan chapter 19 . 5/9/2011
wah wah wah! i dreaded this part for a long is beautifully painful, if that makes any sense...
katiegirl101199 chapter 19 . 5/8/2011
Oh, no! Poor Estelle... :(

And poor Kintra- he did get hurt protecting Chris, right?

I can't believe people would skip through any of this! It's fantastic, and sometimes I even re-read the chapters. Oh, well. But that really is unfortunate that people do that.

Another lovely chapter! And what's this about there being three books? Because I would love it if you just kept writing forever... ;)

ruka93 chapter 19 . 5/8/2011
your story is good.. i just hope chris can keep his complexion snowy white and long hair... i prefer feminine boy better.. i cant wait for the next chapter..
ShortcakeMattie chapter 19 . 5/8/2011
ALL of the characters are important, or else I would not have spent so much time introducing them. True some will die but what they did while alive will impact the entire series. - Wish this didn't have to happen. I think I've told you before that my favorite characters usually die. I try not to get too attached to characters because of this, but you make it impossible not to become attached to them (at least for those who have read everything ;) ). I guess this is what writing is about though, knowing we affect our readers. :)

Anyway... moving onto the chapter now.

"You may not understand, noble cats, because your kind is independent, but in a pack, things are different. Perhaps I am a born leader, but I have learned this: what truly matters is not the skill of a leader, but the confidence his people hold in him." - I really liked this line. It stands true for many leaders, female or not.

"I feel… good. Or maybe I mean to say… more beautiful." Aw. :) That was sweet.

"Good morning!" Their clueless master called, swooping down to greet his pets. "Sleep well?"

Edit: Not sure about this, but I think "Slept well?" sounds better.

Well he had a good point, but Chris was still uncomfortable.

Edit: "Well, he had a good point..."

"Go on," Kintra had turned to Estelle, but Chris kept his grip firm on those delicate little fingers, not allowing Estelle to move. He ignored the warning in his master's eyes, facing the dragon king himself. "Why do want Estelle?"

Edit: "Why do you want Estelle?"

A burst of fire had come from out of nowhere and missed singing him by inches.

Edit: "...and missed singeing him by inches."

Going back to it being impossible not to attach yourself to your characters... wow. I don't know about other readers, but it still amazes me how I can feel what the characters are feeling - loneliness, longing, anguish, fear. Except for the few spelling errors, I can't think of anything to correct.

When it comes to your story, anything can happen. You not only send your characters on a thrilling roller coaster ride, you also send your readers with them.
Ruadhan chapter 19 . 5/8/2011
;m; I did not like this chapter much... Poor Estelle... Please tell me things get better..?
Lederpella chapter 19 . 5/7/2011
Now that I've read it all, I don't want to wait weekly for an update, lol.

So good c:
Lederpella chapter 15 . 5/7/2011
I still have more to read but just to be clear: Heather is his treasure?
Ramar chapter 19 . 5/7/2011
Woah! So much going on! I have always liked the part with Kuro in deep slumber, because before he drifts off into it, his soft spot for Heather is revealed :) Also, is Midi's youngest daughter really going to suffer under Kuro's hands? Because if so, Heather will truly be devastated, angry, and/or crushed.

And it is very sad that Estelle and Chris are now going to be separated, just when they get comfortable with each other. Speaking of which, is that dragon-phoenix hybrid baby (I think), from some chapter before, Kuro and Kintra's sibling? Because there aren't any pure blooded phoenixes left, does that mean this creature was there before the death of the phoenix queen, only hatching now? Or does this indicate that she is still alive somewhere in the castle's dungeons? Or am I totally wrong in thinking that this is actually a dragon-phoenix hybrid? You must have explained in that said chapter before, but it has been such a long while ago...I'll try to search for it and see if I can figure this out :)

Well,this was long... :)Beats the longest reviews I've made in the past D I shall await next Friday, for the next update, with forced patience!
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