Reviews for The Girl Under the Waterfall
QuestionsAnswered chapter 1 . 5/4/2011
Okay, here's my dilema. Is Jesse a boy or a girl?
dipintheriverstyx chapter 25 . 3/7/2011
I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT I LOVED IT
234235134 chapter 25 . 1/27/2011
It's finished! I can't believe it. I think you did a great job. I'd read this again once you plan on editing it.

It would be awesome if you would add Josie's point of view :)
ABC123 chapter 25 . 1/2/2011
Why do you not have reviews?

It's so well-written.
RentBoheme chapter 19 . 1/2/2011
I finally got to the chapter with the "alternate version" that I wrote. I really must say, my version is way better, but you still did a pretty good job.

So much drama is a'formin'. I thought that Jesse's plan was funny and smart. But - how did he bicycle ride with a mermaid on him? That tail must weigh a ton!

Here are typos/suggestions that I have:

"After a few hours past" - "past" should be "passed".

"Time went by as I drank my tea in silence." - This is just a weird sentence. Were we to expect time to freeze?

"Back home, we all usually woke up at different times in the day, so my mom never made us all breakfast. She wanted to take the opportunity she had to make us all breakfast.' - Take out a few things: "Back home, we all usually woke up at different times, so my mom never made us all breakfast. So, today she was jumping on the opportunity to cook for everyone."

"It's okay to be okay," I whispered. - This is quite true, but I think you meant "It's going to be okay."
Retsof chapter 25 . 12/30/2010
This is not the kind of story one would usually find me reading, but I'm glad I found it. I would just like to say that it would be a pity to let the world you created here fade away after a single story. Now, I'm not saying you have to write a sequel right away. Even a oneshot here and there, perhaps set in the years while contact is being established, would be great. They don't even need to feature the same charicters.

Oh, and just to add. I like how you avoided the whole "magic legs" thing that seems so common. And especially that you averted the "evil scientists" trope. Ehm, that's it I guess, see you around.
The Golden Orchid chapter 25 . 12/28/2010
that was a really beautiful story :) but i hoped she'd become human after the surgery...too bad they couldn't do it. but that makes the story realistic. life isn't fair. i'm just glad they worked things out and they're still together...you're a terrific writer, but i'm sure you know that already :P looking forward to reading more of your work! xoxo
irisherin1488 chapter 25 . 12/27/2010
Aw, that was so cute! I was a little disappointed about her not becoming a human, but then I thought seriously? It's not a big deal. Anyways that was the cutest story ever! I loved it! I followed it all the way to the end. You're an amazing writer, keep writing, and good luck on any other stories you plan on persuing!
C. Bradford chapter 25 . 12/27/2010
I am very sad that this is over :(
Nano724 chapter 25 . 12/26/2010
You should write a sequel about Josie and her life underwater with her family! It'd be kind of like the Little Mermaid when she's in love with the human dude and her father's furious about it. No pressure or anything :).

~Nano
GermanSam chapter 25 . 12/26/2010
Aw what a cute ending. I like how you made us all think that she would turn into a human and they would work out but it ended up not turning out that way. I am a little sad that they can't have any little mermaids swiming around or kids padding around. I'm glad they worked out though in the end.

It was a wonderful story! Thank you so much for writing it because I enjoyed reading it. :)

Good luck on any of your other projects.
GermanSam chapter 24 . 12/26/2010
Aw, poor Jessie but Josie does seem to know what she is doing. I really hope this wasn't a heartfelt goodbye and she is going to die. That would be a horrible way to end this story. You will make me cry author and that is a very hard thing to do. Please don't let Josie die!

Is there going to be an epilogue?
Nano724 chapter 24 . 12/26/2010
Amazing! I was hanging on every word.

~Nano
willcate chapter 24 . 12/26/2010
I can't wait for the next chapter!
GermanSam not logged in chapter 23 . 12/23/2010
I like this story so much that I got so excited when I saw that you updated! I apologize for not reviewing sooner but since it's winter break I have some things going on. Anyway I figure that Josie wants to see the scientists to see if they can turn her into a human which would be crazy awesome because then her and Jessie can be together! I look forward to finding out if I'm rght or not. :)
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