You really need to update this. It's gotten even better, and I want to see chapters 2 and 3 up. (By the way, I still love how you ended this.)

wonderful job so far! the story's very descriptive and well-written. i love the part at the beginning with Falk-those little brothers, eh? haha. anyway, the only suggestions i have are:

1. maybe reword the sentence that says, "Or it seemed both, since Falk dashed into being through a bunch of ferns."

i would rewrite it as, "Or both, it seemed. Falk crashed through a bunch of ferns, stopping in front of her."

2. "All Catrain was certain though, was that she was constantly finding herself glad that her darker skin rarely showed a blush."

i would reword the first part of this to, "All Catrain was certain of, though, was that she was glad(etc. etc. etc...)"

of course, these are just suggestions-you don't have to listen to me at all, it's your story after all.

but GREAT JOB. i can't wait for the next chapter!

keep it up!