Dammit! I KNEW there was something about Jade I liked! UGH now he really is dead, and we find out he isnt a totally bastard! RAWR you, RAWR. Just fucking RAWR.

AH MORE NOW

AH JADES DEAD! NOO I actually kinda like him...O.o lol OH WELL! For a sequel, you should make him come back to life...lol!

O OMG WAR! Lol AH

This is absolutely beautiful. Anything else I could say wouldn't work. Amazing job on this chapter; everything is just so perfect.

Wow... really weird! What is the call? Why are the people she thought where dead alive and well? What goes on in the calling bulidings? Can't wait for more!

I'm guessing you got this idea from 1984 by George Orwell?

theres a lot of similarities like the 'Calling Building' is more or less like the 'Ministry Of Love' in that when people go in they never come out, people are tortured and killed there and when they're sent there its as if they never existed.

and like when Lee mentioned 'Big Brother'

its well written anyway :)

Very nice and very...climatic(: It's really nice how everything is described and you can tell by their actions what their emotion are and her viewpoint about everything is really nice. Keep up the good work, but I'm wondering, what will happen now? O.o

Oh, suspense! :O

So, I still really like this. It's interesting, really. I was thinking why she wouldn't be hoping Mark would show up out of nowhere but then it makes it better. It would be too typical for her to be waiting for a hero. I mean, if he's going to be the knight in shining armor, it's better not to keep everything about him the natual, you know? Anwyway...good job and keep up the good work! Nice job!

WHY!

So, I really, really need to know what happens and I STILL don't know! You seem to know how to build the suspense, don't you? Gah! One pointer;

Don't say 'common,' it's 'come on.'

But that's all, 'cause you're great!

Update soon!

It may just be the first chapter ... but I am definitely enthralled in this story already. You have a marvellous flow to your words; they just read so easily on the page. I was pretty freaked there for a second when she was called!

My god, this was a deep chapter. "There's no ladder to climb back to the summit from here. So I have to make one for myself. Before you land on top of me." I just had to stop and think after I read this. You my friend have a gift.

I hate him too!

I find it extremely amazing that you can basically base off a chapter as long as this and have it be only about one thing. But it's not boring; that's where you're good.

I'm really liking how she talks to Mark even though he's not there. It's sweet and you can really tell she loves him without her actually saying it or anything.

This is great and I can't wait to see what happens!

wow, this story is like a book id pick up at a bookstore! Holey hell its good!

This story is absolutely amazing!

You are an awesome writer and this story is so interesting that I can't wait to find out what will happen. Can't wait!