|Reviews for The Kenite|
| matte chapter 27 . 3/17/2011
I really loved this story! I hope you will you make a sequel, because i will surely read it. Original story and well written, this is really a wonderful work! A pity that you recieved only 4 reviews, your story deserved better. By the way, be sure that if you will do a sequel i won't miss it. Again, a really beautiful story.
Only a small critique: your first chapter was not...written well as the others, and maybe that's why you had only a few reviews. Sadly, often people looks only at the first chapter of a story before deciding if keep reading it or not. But the other chapters were well written.
| Danica West chapter 2 . 8/14/2010
Just stopped by to see what this was all about. (the word 'FBI' attracts me like moth to a flame)
It could be an interesting plot. It does seems a bit unpolished, but practise makes perfect.
Keep writing :)
| Averick chapter 1 . 8/11/2010
This is a very intriguing beginning. Poor guy, lost his partner, hehe. Poor Mac. Elizabeth seems pretty cool and what's up with the Assistant Director guy? Hmm. Like it so far!
| SCopySCat91 chapter 1 . 8/10/2010
I noticed that your not getting many reviews. Would you mind a few words of wisdom? If not keep reading. You have a really good plot and I LOVE the idea, but the beginning makes me want to walk away. Not that it is bad or boring. It's quite the contrary, but all of the "the woman" and "the man" gets confusing. If you dont want to mention names say things like, "the black-haired menace" or something better, cause I know that example was pitiful. Oh, and shorter chapter might hold people's attention more.
| TriforceofEternity chapter 1 . 8/1/2010
I like the part where you introduce Elizabeth's name as part of the story so we can know what is going on while fitting to the theme of the questioning.
"agent Gregory Simons had been questioning the woman for more than two hours and in that time had gotten exactly nothing out of her. According to her identification her name was Elizabeth Gordon and she was a bounty hunter based out of Illinois. All he had been able to get out of her was that the man she had been chasing, one Rupert Groning, was a wanted fugitive that she had been hired to bring back."
I have never heard of the word Kenit before: Does it have anything to do with Kites?
*goes to look it up*
I just want to point out agent should be Agent but this is not a classroom though some spelling Nazis may flame you harshly because they are teachers who got bullied as kids.