A good story. Thanks for sharing it.

One question or correction. You typed "I grunted in response, tired of dealing with her. Right before I went back to the table where our coats were, I grabbed Rachel and gave her a long, lingering kiss. I knew that it would probably just fuel Rachel's anger, but I wanted it to be clear to her – and to Nora – that I was Nora's." Based upon the rest of this sentence, I assume that Daniel kissed Nora, but in this paragraph you said that he kissed Rachel. Which is it?

Possibly the cutest, most heart warming story I have ever read. I usually dislike shy characters but I couldn't help but love Nora, she was lovely, as was Daniel. The romance between the two was perfect and it made my day reading this story.

Thanks for the awesome story,

Pippee :)

Simply an amazing story! :)
Peace, Love and Happiness! :)
Bubbly Girl

Whose point of view is this chapter from? It seems to jump from Lucy's to Nora's and back.

Awww that was a sweet story! )

"Solor Girl"

haha loved it!

Fun story, here is a little mess up that I saw..

I grunted in response, tired of dealing with her. Right before I went back to the table where our coats were, I grabbed Rachel and gave her a long, lingering kiss. I knew that it would probably just fuel Rachel's anger, but I wanted it to be clear to her – and to Nora – that I was Nora's.

I think you meant to say that you grabbed Nora instead of Rachel.. I did a double take when I read that…

I like how you showed them talking in their heads.

:)

I really was surprised with this story, the plot sounded cute but I expected it to be cliche-which it was but not in the same way that I was expecting. I really liked that your characters are wholesome. I appreciated the not swearing, not drinking, going to church...I think that some authors are so stuck on trying to be "cool high school student" they don't remember that not everyone does that. I appreciate reading about characters with values. I'm looking forward to reading the story about Ashleigh and Van-I've been waiting as soon as Van was mentioned. I'd also like to see even a little one-shot of Daniel and Nora later in life.

"...I grabbed Rachel and gave her a long, lingering kiss."

Umm... I'm pretty sure you meant to put Nora instead of Rachel.

I loved your story! :)

Wow! This story is amazing! ) I loved reading it! The characters and story line were awesome, and I love the fact that this story didn't have any cuss words in it. It was really refreshing not to have to change out the words in my head. I didn't think the ending was corney either. I thought it was cute ) I pray things go well for you and your family. Thanks so much for sharing your story!

~chocoyum4~

hey! i really like the development in nora's character. when she opens up. when she reconnects with her family. it's all quite realistic, though it may not be as emotionally wrought as some authors' works. all in all, a pretty good job :)

hey! enjoying this story so far. :) ur male character is right: he's a real pansy! he sounds more like a girl than a guy. unfortunately, i have no insight into the male psyche at all! so i cant suggest anything except that u ask a guy to proofread ur story, someone ur really close to who wouldnt mind putting in a lot of effort to point out every part which is unrealistic of a guy and to explain how a guy might think like instead.

besides that, there's a slight discrepancy that u might like to clear up. early in the story, Ashleigh says to Daniel that he joined a band because of Solo Girl. but later on, he tells Nora that not even Ashleigh knows about his third job, which is the kids' band. assuming the bands are one and the same, that's something u might want to clear up. :)

You wrote:

"I grabbed Rachel and gave her a long, lingering kiss. I knew that it would probably just fuel Rachel's anger, but I wanted it to be clear to her – and to Nora – that I was Nora's."

O.O Did he kiss Rachel or was that a typo?

I knew whenI started reading this story that you had to have been in marching band in HS. I also marched, but I was in the colorguard. Fun times.

Loved the story! I love being able to read a story and not have to worry about encountering a bunch of cussing, swearing, and sex stuff. That was the first thing I liked about it. The second thing was Nora and her shyness. I can relate to her, although I have to admit to not being paralyzed by shyness, I think you did an awesome job portraying that and her step by step of getting over it. I was going through a shy period in my life when my mom taught me something she learned at church. She said that shyness is almost a form of selfishness because it keeps you from sharing yourself with others. Who knows what kind of influence you can have on people if you aren't shy. I think you portrayed that well in this story too with how Nora was able to help Mandy. Danial was the perfect person to help her Nora. Patient, respectful, and kind. I loved the ending. Nora telling her that she would probably win in a fight. That's just cool.

I enjoyed reading this story. Thanks for writing it!

I love this story! But I'm just cOnfused about what was wrong with Ashleigh...