Reviews for Special Delivery
KayleeJohn chapter 6 . 10/2/2010
Seriously, don't you re-read your stories after you post them? In one single chapter, i can find about 4 flaws... and their pretty short chapters too. I'm not saying you haven't got gold here but you have to re-write practically the whole story. I suggest you pull this story from the site and re-read it and revise and all that jazz. Then post it again.
KayleeJohn chapter 3 . 10/2/2010
You might want to add more description because now im confused and its really like im just reading a script instead of a story.
KayleeJohn chapter 1 . 10/2/2010
Try making a more clear difference in the point of views