Reviews for Ridin' Herd: Roaming the Range
Robert Shannon chapter 2 . 1/15/2011
I like how you did the accents in your dialoge. It made your characters seem more real to me.

You could benefit from a spell checker. I listed some of your typos, but there were more. Every time I come to a misspelling, it's like hitting a speed bump - it makes your story hard to read. A spell checker would catch most of these.

Typos and Grammar:

'Emily studined the stranger' [s/b studied]

'he said quiter to her then he did' [s/b 'quieter' and 'than']

'she had gottne their supper was' [s/b 'she had gotten there their supper was']

'perminant shelter.' [s/b 'permanent shelter']

'sighed with content and listned to what' [s/b 'contentment' and 'listened']

'slept exteramly lightly' [s/b 'extremely']

*Complements of the Review Game's Review Marathon. See my profile to find out more.
Robert Shannon chapter 1 . 1/15/2011
It's not just a Western, it's a mystery. I liked the twist. You put me in a scene in the middle of the nineteenth century, when along comes a motorcycle. Now I have to read chapter two to see what happens next.

I think it would read better if you put more of a break when the point-of-view changes. Extra white space, an elipsis, maybe a few asterisks - something to show that the scene has changed would make it easier to follow.

Typos and Grammar:

'good through all her timest that she '

"I'm absoluty lost," [s/b absolutely]

"and Billies lost control" [s/b Billie's]

'said as he picke it up right' [s/b picked]

*Complements of the Review Game's Review Marathon. See my profile to find out more.