Reviews for Friends Best Friends
The Autumn Queen chapter 1 . 5/20/2012
I wouldn't know. Haven't read her work - leave that to Dad.

Anyway, I really like the content of this poem. It almost reads like a stream of consciousness, which is really great to get into the head of the character. And it's doubly great because it's something I can sympathise with.

Your punctuations seem to read rather oddly, particularly since there's no paragraph breaks. For example, the lines: "We used to play around the swings

Now I'm lucky if you spare a second" - really should be split up with something more monumental than a line break, particularly in comparison to the lines that come before and after. And it seems somewhat you've underdone the variation of pause, ie. punctuation and such, at the beginning while overdoing it just a tad at the end...although the easing worked quite well in relation to the narrative voice. Try varying the punctuation towards the end instead of the repeated fullstops. For example: "When I need advice.

It used to be you." - I don't think a fullstop particularly suits after "advice". A comma perhaps, or even nothing at all.

"Now you're getting chummy with her

Again

Why ?" - that's an interesting place to throw "again" into. There's no telling which sentence it goes with. :) That's a good thing I think. It can go either or none. Interesting play on words there.

But yeah, nice poem. Particularly the end.
thefaultinourpatronus chapter 1 . 3/9/2011
Stephanie Mayers? No no, no way. That would be a total insult, and I thought this was really cool! I like how so many different emotions are portrayed through the different parts of the poem. In the beginning, it didn't seem like the protagonist missed the best friend, but in the end, it's like she really does want her back. Interesting! I also like how you put random names in there (: Overall good work!

x mandy
Faithless Juliet chapter 1 . 10/2/2010
In response to you’re a/n – I would say no.

The first thing that jumped off the page for me was the “I don’t even know if you like Edward or Jacob” I literally chuckled (all in a good way off course). I like that you added that in there because it’s culturally relevant, you’ll look back on this piece in five or ten years and I’m sure you’ll think the same thing. I do, however, have to say that it distracts from the piece slightly, for the same reason. Also, having read that line, it makes me think that you’re trying to sound like Stephanie Meyer, and if that’s the case you shouldn’t, you should want to sound like *you* and no one else.

Overall I think the piece was good; very confessional, and light in tone, though you were expressing some deep emotions. Sometimes when you go for themes like this and you get all: “I hate the world” it distracts from the overall meaning of the piece, which you did not do here, and like I said I liked that. I did feel like the piece was a bit too long though, confessional poetry (as opposed to prose, which in terms of what you have here in length might actually work better) is best served short, otherwise things tend to drag on a bit. I enjoyed the read through, keep up the good work.

Much love,

Juliet.