|Reviews for fault lines|
| Scarsdon'tfade chapter 1 . 11/22/2012
We'll never admit it, but when we see the word trigger, we click on it, because deep down, we want a reason.
| RedemptionIsOverrated chapter 1 . 9/14/2012
you have very good writing technique
| Ivy Climbroe chapter 1 . 6/19/2012
Wow. This is so emotionally impacting, I love all the words on this page. Incredible. Keep it up :)
| punctured.lungs chapter 1 . 8/2/2011
this was emotionally exhausting to read, but in a good way. sort of. i don't know what i mean, except that i really love this. the lines "where i tried to scratch your fingerprints off of me;" "i lived in my head, and you made that a place i didn't want to be anymore." and the last stanza. amazing. incredible.
| limpwrist chapter 1 . 2/14/2011
Sad and intense, well written. Sorry, I wish I was about to put what I want to say into words
| lymli chapter 1 . 12/22/2010
I think this is very thoughtful.
the verse 2 bout walkin by the water, made me think bout that part in bible...
and I really love the verse 4, the imagery bout the mind being antibacterial and growing up and making stories is cool.
you're good writer even if you're young, the most of guys just write bout broken hearts.
| silviculture chapter 1 . 11/25/2010
amazing emotion is portrayed in this poem.
| lipleaf chapter 1 . 10/17/2010
I can see why this would be emotionally draining- so much is packed into this poem. You captured all of the feelings people have a hard time expressing very well. The ending was lovely (in a heart-aching sort of way). The rough tone was beautifully done and carried throughout the poem and it was perfect for the rawness of the speaker's emotions. I like that the piece was concrete and blatant, not vague or abstract. It made the impact that much greater.
| Angel Investor chapter 1 . 9/27/2010
Amazing! That was... wow. Definitely one of the best and deepest poems I have read on this site. Very hateful. And it's a good thing. Not all poems need to be wistful and sentimental lovey dovey heart breaks with over used lines. And the best part was, even though this poems was very dark, it wasn't angsty. I've grown tired of "I'm cutting my wrists coz nobody loves me" poems. This is a slap in the face to such cliches. Exemplary job.
"my soul a plastic bag jammed in my throat."
"i lived in my head,
and you made that a place
i didn't want to be anymore."
My favorite part.
You are very talented. Keep going, man. I've got nothing to correct (except capitalizing "I", but who cares?). :)
| Insanity Streak chapter 1 . 9/26/2010
Wow. The emotion in this is so raw and honest. To me, what you have written, THIS is poetry. Well done.
| cecyouyed chapter 1 . 9/26/2010
:o This metaphors are soo great, and what I like is that they are not that hard to find out. I could feel eveerything in there as read, and I think that is the purpose of poetry, to make others feel what you felt wwhile writing. Keep it up!