|Reviews for Me, unhinged|
| NearlyPrescient chapter 15 . 5/11/2011
Such a varied flow of images. Maybe not any more so or less so than usual, but it just seems though the openly and closing images couldn't be further apart.
I really the the magnet image.
| NearlyPrescient chapter 12 . 4/10/2011
short and to the point. very effective.
at the same time, I feel as though there's more to be said, too, albeit maybe unnecessarily. it might just be a local thing, but it seems like the big craze that's the other side of dubstep is remixes, endlessly recycling the same old material and calling it new. it seems as though that's just begging to be addressed.
just a thought, but definitely an excellent piece for what you get into and how you handle it.
| NearlyPrescient chapter 11 . 3/29/2011
This one seems sort of disjointed, as though you're explaining or examining a few things and it's not quite clear how they go together. It seems like there's a disconnect somewhere that makes it difficult to get a sense of a whole, or of multiple distinct and separate wholes. It seems like there's a lot here, but I find it very difficult to get my head around.
I really like the imagery though.
| schizosophia chapter 4 . 3/9/2011
I really connect with this.
| NearlyPrescient chapter 8 . 3/3/2011
this one feels really unique, sort of a blend of half-hopefulness and certainty. as though being certain and hopeful but at the same acknowledging that it might just be a matter of perspective, like being only mostly convinced. I think it's most apparent in the line "We all have different definitions." it makes for a very interesting disparity with the 3/2 piece
| NearlyPrescient chapter 7 . 3/3/2011
really strong voice and sense of character in the first part. that said, I think I like the second part better. guess i'm just more of a fan of your more standard voice, but I think it also seemed a little less abstract, a little more familiar, which is to say better suited to my preferences.
still, great work.
| Alias Blue chapter 4 . 1/3/2011
And number 4:
The shortest are always the best. You just need simple, blunt statements to make an impact.
But the repetition gave it that poetic feel.
Have you ever read Stephen Crane's poetry? I think you'd like it. Thanks very much, I thoroughly enjoyed this.
PM me for a chat if you like.
| Alias Blue chapter 3 . 1/3/2011
Number three I really like as well. I think about this all the time. I feel a little like I've discovered a like-minded person. :) You said the form could do with some tweaks, and I agree it's a little awkward in places. But again, I really like your style. It's not over-elaborate. I like the subtlety, and the hidden rhythm given by the internal rhymes and style of spoken speech.
| Alias Blue chapter 2 . 1/3/2011
I like the second one a lot, because it had that surreal, fantasy crossed with realism feel. And the personification of death has always interested me. The way you gave death a doctor's bag and needle, freaked me out a bit. In a good way. :)
| Alias Blue chapter 1 . 1/3/2011
This was going to be one long review, but people tend to judge the worth of writing on how many reviews it has on FP. So I thought I'd separate it up as a way of giving you more support. Hehe. :)
I really like your style of poetry. It's the kind of straight-talking, rhythmic stuff I like. The first one was a little long, and rambling to me. There were some lovely lines in it, I especially liked the last few stanzas, but I couldn't figure out the subject matter.
| SmashedIce.X chapter 3 . 11/6/2010
These are all good poems, but my favourite is the third one because I actually find myself relating to it which I don't often find with poetry. Great work! :)
| NearlyPrescient chapter 3 . 11/4/2010
I like this because it's about me. we're all selfish machines, and the reason I like this is that I'm finally seeing someone that sees the world the same way as me.
| schizosophia chapter 1 . 9/30/2010
I read this twice. I really admire how you distill the intensity of her disillusionment here.