Reviews for The Ultimate Sin: A Sin Novel
PandaRocker chapter 8 . 3/23/2012
That was such a great story I loved it please keep writing great stories like this :)
mia aurora chapter 5 . 4/17/2011
i hope you don't stop writing because this story is amazingly good :)
LivesTooShort52 chapter 5 . 1/16/2011
Really good. At the beggining of the chapter you say "clutched" a lot. I really like your writing and you add lots of detail, but try using a thesaurus to add some more vocabulary to your story and I think you'll do just fine. :) Keep up the good work.
LivesTooShort52 chapter 4 . 11/28/2010
Really good. I can't wait to see where this is heading. A couple of ideas/tips:

1) Try doing something from Angel's POV

2) Add a little bit more details (How did Angel escape exactly?)

3) Try adding more descriptive words... Instead of using 'ran' use 'cascaded' or 'bolted' (Use your friendly Thesaurus - dispite its spelling, it's not a scary dinosaur - lol)

4) Use your senses! (Sight, Smell, Touch, Sound, etc...)

Try adding more details into your paragraph. Don't forget; YOU know what you want to say, but your READER doesn't.
horse4ever chapter 4 . 11/24/2010
please write more

its really good
Lettuce.B.Frank chapter 3 . 11/2/2010
Oh poor Angel. She is probably so scared. Is the whole book going to be from Lucifer's point of view? Okay update soon bye.
veyo chapter 3 . 11/1/2010
Awesome story, please update!
o.OOOOO chapter 1 . 10/25/2010
you know in all of history Lucifer has only killed one person, while god has killed many.
Lettuce.B.Frank chapter 2 . 10/24/2010
I like it. Please update soon. Okay, bye.