|Reviews for Milk|
| darkershadeofpale chapter 1 . 6/2/2011
I like this. There's pathos, but it's not the bad kind.
And really do quite like the 'rose above five thousand years of
snaketonguevenom': it's a great image, and also an accurate one, I think.
Yep. I have nothing intelligent left to say.
. darker shade of pale
| StoryMonster chapter 1 . 12/9/2010
Your poetry is very good.
As another reviewer probably mentioned, it DID remind me of 'To Kill a Mockingbird', a book I love.
Your grammar was kinda messed up here, but overall, though the meaning of the poem as such is hard to comprehend, it is very interesting, you know?
Food for thought types.
Great going, and keep writing!
| wammyboys chapter 1 . 11/8/2010
Amazing word play. I must say I didn't know many of the actual words you used, which is probably because I'm sure they weren't in english. Anyway, I felt some sort of strong figurative meaning behind all of this and I can't put my hand on what exactly that meaning was. I'm not sure if this counts in the word-play category, but great personification.(i.e. "blood always tells - it lies")
I must say, that was not easy to follow at all. It was almost as if it were written to turn your brain around in circles, and if it really was, then good job.
Punctuation and Grammar: Just wanted to point it out, a lot of grammatical errors. However, I have the suspicion they were intentional. In that case, bravo; it worked well.
Subject: This was the best thing about the poem. The whole theme of the story was very unique. It made me think of "To Kill A Mockingbird". Also, the time period portrayal played it very well too.
| YasuRan chapter 1 . 10/27/2010
Deep stuff here. I found myself pouring over the last three stanzas to make sense of the bigger picture. I find myself liking the second last one more and more because if how thought-provoking it is. 'And I am not to call you brother because blood lies still' is a powerful line. Minus the 'still', it reads quite differently but not so much as to change the whole theme of the poem. 'I did not drink from your mother's breast because it was not offered' actually made me pause and think for a while. Inspiring.
Those last two lines are a wonderful finish as well. Great work again.