|Reviews for Direction Of A Fool|
| agrader chapter 1 . 12/20/2012
This seems to speak of a deep troubling hurt. Your command of the English language to express it is incredible.
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 11/27/2010
The first two stanzas seemed like quite a runon sentence the way you punctuated it. I might split it up into two sentences at least.
I loved the word choices here. They were really interesting and they also set a great tone for the type of person who was narrating this piece. You really got a feel for them as a proper high status individual.
I thought the idea behind the piece was interesting. It definitely made me want to know more about this relationship between the two of them. Why she turned to him for help in the first place for instance. I also liked the ending. The idea of sympathy after someone did something horrible is an interesting one, but I especially like how you linked the sympathy with almost a preachiness, which made it seem less genuinely sympathetic in a way.
PS Check out the Review Game and/or it's Review Marathon (links in my profile!)
| Random-Idiocity chapter 1 . 11/23/2010
Feels like forever since I last logged into FP. I've been pretty busy so that's why it's taken so long for me to review you. I absolutely loved this. ''I fell into the shadow side of me'' - ''it is obvious that you are struggling in the war of love, but playing a side game of darts with my naive heart''. Those were my favorite lines. Wonderful job. Keep it Up!
| nickyO chapter 1 . 11/19/2010
"Side game of darts with my naive heart as the centre target is truly the direction of a fool" - great line; well thought out sentiment of someone hurt but with dignity intact.
I like the image of the dart game alot, but if I'd use it for a poem to describe what tends to go on in my universe, the thrower would be drunk and probably blindfolded-the point of the dart being that sometimes people just throw things out there not really knowing what they're aiming at until it hits. ;)
| Amandriella Peetrifica chapter 1 . 11/15/2010
WOW! I bet you wrote this in the heat of the moment because it is blossoming with passion-filled emotion! I love this! It really draws you in and almost makes you (well, it made me anyway) able to place myself in your shoes to an extent and feel the same..
I love the hinted play on word-usage.
And loads of the lines are ones that others can identify with as well, so I feel this is going to be one of those timeless works of art that will help many other "naive hearts".. :)
The last line resonates a powerful truth as well: Patience and honesty takes a lot less humiliation... and are two highly powerful qualities that I personally wish more held..
| Melanie Layugan chapter 1 . 11/13/2010
Wow, just jaw-dropping and empowering. Keep it up.
| The lone canine chapter 1 . 11/12/2010
This one is my favorite one so far, especially with the way it is written. Really great job and keep on going!
| lymli chapter 1 . 11/12/2010
I dunno why, but this sounded like a essay to me, I like the patience thing...
| Mirabella chapter 1 . 11/11/2010
Wow, very deep. I love the colour you can create with your wonderful vocabulary and word flow. Also, this poem structure really works for you. :)
| Punslinger chapter 1 . 11/11/2010
This is an impressive relationship poem with strong imagery such as "But never did I envision you eventually attempting to rape my total sanity." But there are also touches of grim humor: "Side game of darts with my heart as the centre target." Overall, heartbreakingly beautiful.
| Kati chapter 1 . 11/11/2010
Anna I really like this one! Very nice! :) it seems to hold a lot of emotion.
Always and forever,