Jasly seems jealous, poor girl. :(

tHE STORY IS GREAT, THOUGH! : )

Book stealing bitch!
Sorry had to say that god I hate it when people do that although I think its been taken down I couldn't find it

Hi Amaka! Firstly, I want to apologize for only just seeing this now, but I haven't checked my old email for a while, and this alert was on that. Secondly, I'm sorry this has happened! I sent a rather angry message to Amazon complaining about it and giving them facts and stuff, hoping that eventually they might be able to take it down. In the mean time, WHERE'S THAT EPILOGUE?

Oh, and secondly, HOW'S SCHOOL? We all miss you so much as school, and when Doyin got us to fill in that sheet for the Youth Parliament thing and we had to choose a leader, I swear everyone in the class yelled "AMAKA!" and wrote you on our sheets. So yeah, we miss you! How's school going? Is it tough? I'm finding one AS hard, let alone what you're doing!

Anyway, I hope you're doing amazing and that you like your new school and that everyone's nice to you and you've shown them how amazing you are and yeah, HOW'S EVERYTHING? :-D

talk to Crystal99 Kate Hopkins did the same thing to her and she talked to Amazon and they are working on it with her.

You should contact Crystal99 because her work was plagiarized by the same person. She contacted Amazon about this, maybe you could get some help from her.

Hey, girlfriend! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW FURIOUS TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR COPY CAT! Aren't you really happy to have people who skip to the end now? I mean I know I shouldn't but... I'll read the whole thing later! Don't get mad. Please, cue the puppy eyes. It just so happens that I have a Kindle so as soon as I read about the plaguarism I wrote the review to warn other readers to not read that asswhole's book. What a whore! I mean she's got to have guts to copy your story. Like the saying goes, Karma's a bitch. Pardon my language, spelling, and grammer errors. I'm usually peaceful but nothing riles me up like plaguarism. Actually I'm not allowed to cuss...Shoot! My parents are so gonna kill me if they find out about this. Plus I'm using my Kindle so... Yeah. Hard to type. Anyway check out my review on Amazon in 2 days. Hopefully it will come sooner but... Oh, and PM chewwy the muffin (no, I did not misspell chewwy) to write the review about that effing copy cat. Ask her to spread the word and stuff. She knows people. I'm going to make story about plaguarism so keep an eye on me 'kay? Oh. This isn't private. Oh well. See ya!

I am impressed. This is one of the few stories on fictionpress that I have read entirely through-and in one sitting, no less! So, allow me to give my thoughts-and since I like to end on a positive note, I will start with cons first and then do pros.

There were a few spelling and grammar issues, but none too jarring. What bothered me was the more minor characters: Ariel's friends, save for a few mentions, were mostly characterized as boyish and girlish, but no specific character traits. Ariel's mom seemed to be acting uptight, but why? I thought it was some remaining agony from the death of the father, but no clear motive was given as to why she was being so antagonistic, other than supposed concern, which wasn't too apparent considering she was downright nasty at some points. And Jade... She sort of dropped out of the plot after she apologized, which means that if Ariel never actually addressed it, then Jade ultimately the better person. Lastly, Ariel forgot her own lesson-chapter 23 was ensign on how she realized she had neglected her friends, but they are only given a passing mention. And if it is to be believed that she could easily keep contact with her friends, what prompted her and Blake to drift. Maybe it is because of my personal circumstances, but to me even seeing him in person would be to die for if she cared enough.

Now for the pros. Your characterization is magnificent, because I actually found myself caring for your characters. Whenever Ariel was doing well with Blake I was happy; whenever Jade was being mean to Ariel I was like "That bitch!" Your description was fluid, and you showed what the characters were like rather than fluid. Don't worry, your perspective for Blake in the one chapter when it was his point of view was fine, because as far as I'm aware, girls and guys don't think too differently. Your choice of diction was sophisticated without straying to purple prose. The main protagonists were compelling as characters.

You say this is your first story? Well, I'm impressed. There are flaws, but it is one of the better stories on this site. It is a lot better than my first story, to be sure. Keep writing. You have an auspicious future in the field as ling as you keep practicing. Good luck with your future endeavors!

Im sorry to hear about what happened to your story, i loved it by the way and its one of my favorites. Keep fighting!

This is the third time THIS WEEK that the author of one of my favourite stories on this website has had their work stolen.

I think it is disgusting to take someone's story - a story they've put so much effort and imagination into - and to claim it as their own, and even more vile is those who attempt to make a profit from it. I'm so, so sorry that this has happened to you. I hope you can sort this out, and Kate Hopkins gets stopped. She's done it with another author on here, you know. It's awful.

I hope things worked out. I adored this story, and it is a shame someone else didn't respect how good a writer you are and tried to profit off of YOUR hard work. You have my sympathy and support :)

- Hearts of Pyjamas

DUDE! YOU CAN SING! :D (sorry for the "bam, there it is"-ness of that comment... we Americans are straightforward...) I FREAKING LOVE YOUR ACCENT! How I wish I was British... Anywho... GREAT JOB!

I really liked this story! At the beginning, I was skeptical on the plot line thing, but you seriously DELIVERED on the whole roller coaster effect! :) I found your story through "Not By Blood", and I've done nothing but read it since I found it this morning! Awesome job... WRITE ANOTHER! :)

Just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed your story! You did a very good job of laying out the characters and keeping the story moving. Keep up the writing!

awesome story!

Aw Amaka your cover was amazing! I'm on my phone so I can't like the video or anything, but if I remember tomorrow then I will!

I must admit, I did kinda think this would be the epilogue. Mind you, the title of the "chapter" was a bit of a give away. You have to update soon!

Also, speaking of updates, I updated again! I'm determined to keep you up to date haha, and tell Doyin she has some reading to do!

Loved the cover, and I'll love an epilogue some time before I turn 30! :-)

I'

omg amaka this is sooooo good. you should definitely write more stories!