|Reviews for Journey for the Heart!|
| Lady Scarlet of Stormhold chapter 1 . 12/20/2010
This is quite good. I read your review on The Feng Shui Of Reviews, and decided to come review one of your stories.
I've never heard of this game. But I think it's quite interesting, how he falls in love with her, although he's never actually met her. But I have noticed that the tenses change sometimes, from past to present, when it seems like it should be in all the same tense. The first part is all in the past tense, but then when he gets up and gets some raisins it changes to present, and then it keeps changing back and forth. I, presonally, prefer writing in the past tense, and sometimes when I write in the present tense, I keep accidentally going back to past tense, and then I find it hard to stay in the correct tense. So what I'm saying is stick with the tense you're most comfortable writing in, and have a look through after you've finished to make sure you've not made any mistakes. I hope that helps! :D