Reviews for SWAPPED!
StoryMonster chapter 20 . 1/3/2011


I wanted more.

It was great.

I'm sorry for not reviewing each chapter - too engrossed to be looking for mistakes and telling you how it was.

It was awesome by the way.


Liya Smith chapter 3 . 12/30/2010
Hi! Okay. I only had a little problem with this chapter. I think capitalizing one entire word is a little too strong.

"Hey drinking has got NOTHING to do with being a goody two shoes," she practically screamed.

If she is practically screaming, I think you should replace the comma with a exclamation point and uncapitalize nothing.

"Hey, drinking has got nothing to do with being a goody two-shoes!" she practically screamed.

If you feel the need to add extra emphasis on a specific word, try italicizing. It adds the needed affect without changing the flow.

But nice chapter so far!

Also, I forgot to mention this, but I was sent by the RR Forum! :)
Liya Smith chapter 2 . 12/30/2010
Wow I actually knew some of the places in this chapter because

I am Indian. A nice shocking, yet relatable, surprise! I was a bit confused in the first chapter so I had skipped to the second to see if I got any explanations. Iemon seems like an interesting character and so does Sara. I'm wondering where you will go with these two characters.
thefaultinourpatronus chapter 20 . 12/29/2010
Ahh it's done! I'm so sorry for not reviewing all your chapters, I was loyal in the beginning, but not towards the end, I hope you'll forgive me. Anyway, you know I love this; I think it's really great. I'd love to read the sequel! Congratulations on finishing, it's something I hope to do someday (: Amazing work, Annie!

x mandy
Eiya Weathes chapter 5 . 12/27/2010
Again Iemon and Sara just can't stop blah-blah-ing. They're seriously cute.

I like how you slowed down the pace to help the readers get used to the characters. They're very realistic, by the way.

I think you should add more description. It would really add to the realism.

There are a few grammatical errors here and there. Maybe you should proofread this.

- Amethyst Penn

~ This review is sponsored by the Gossip Forum.
Eiya Weathes chapter 4 . 12/27/2010
I like how their 'playful banter' lightened up the atmosphere. It was quick to read.

The dialogue is amazing. Very quirky and realistic. It's a fun read and I'm seriously loving how they interact. I'm thinking that they'd be cute together.

I love the little cliff hanger in the end.

- Amethyst Penn

~ This review is sponsored by the Gossip Forum.
Eiya Weathes chapter 3 . 12/27/2010
First of all, concerning your A/N. I think it IS called a preface but I'm not entirely sure. I'd call it an excerpt but then. Yeah.

Anyway, I'm glad that I'm seeing more character from Iemon. He's quite interesting to read about and I love his lines.

He and Sara are definitely cute together and I love how they interact. It's amusing and adorable at the same time. Sara's definitely a fun character.

I like how you added some foreshadowing devices of a possible 'body swap' as the non-prologue suggested/hinted.

- Amethyst Penn

~ This review is sponsored by the Gossip Forum.
Eiya Weathes chapter 2 . 12/27/2010
First of all: Iemon. How do you pronounce that? Ha ha.

Reading this, I noticed a few grammatical errors but I believe that the other reviewers have already mentioned them.

Iemon seems to be a normal and slightly average teenage boy and it's not really a bad thing but I think it goes against your intention. I mean, I recall a paragraph saying that he had the urge to kill someone. If that's the case, I think you're aiming for something different then. I think you should consider adding a bit more of character and depth. A few thoughtful thoughts here and there.

The tone of the story was too formal for my taste but if you wanted it like that, then I'm sorry for bringing this up. It just seemed I said, formal for the point of view of a teenage boy.

I like how you chose India as the setting for all these. It's kind of refreshing since most of the stories I've read are in London or America. This is actually a solid chapter.

- Amethyst Penn

~ This review is sponsored by the Gossip Forum.
Eiya Weathes chapter 1 . 12/27/2010
Wow. There's nothing I could say about this.

This worked well as a prologue because it has a great cliff hanger: "Those eyes were mine!" It's a great hook that interested me into reading more. I wanted to know how they got to that mess.

As I said, nothing I could say about this. Everything's perfect and I like how you introduced the story.
Kobra Kid chapter 4 . 12/27/2010
-"Hey, here's the Office." Sara said, and pointed it to me.

when you capitalize 'office', it makes me think about the TV show. Just change all of them to lowercase and it'll be fine.

-"He's the editor of this magazine: Everything under the Sun."

Instead of a ':', but a comma.

-"Yes, your father and his school friend. Bless him: I've never seen him so happy."

Instead of a ':', but a period.

This was great! I loved the dialogue between Sara and Iemon, it was very amusing and entertaining. Not only those things, but realistic as well! My only concern was that there wasn't a lot of descriptions at all, but that's probably just me. I love some good descriptions. :) Anyways, I feel like something big is going to happen soon! Great work!

-Kobra Kid, Gossip

If you don't mind, may you please payback via Rise From The Ashes? Thank you!
Racer283 chapter 20 . 12/27/2010
Pretty interesting way to end the story. I'll be looking forward to the pre-sequel and then the sequel to this story. I wonder who will be swapped in the sequel or if it will be Iemon and Sara again. Anyways keep up the good work and hopefully I can write more on my story and you can read it. I'll be looking forward to reading more.
CraziiFlop chapter 21 . 12/26/2010
Amazing ending :) It warms my heart. I loved your story and I wanted to be sure you knew that w Hope to see new stories and adventures from you. Keep on writing!

Racer283 chapter 19 . 12/24/2010
Pretty good chapter can't wait to read the epiloge and I will be looking forward to the sequel and see what all happens in that story. It would be interesting if those two swapped bodies again in the sequel. Anyways keep up the good work.
Vernelley chapter 8 . 12/24/2010
Yes! Finally the drama! SOUL SWAPPING :D


But NOW it's getting interesting ;D Not that it wasn't interesting before. But it's the heart of the drama! Or close to it, at least.

The setup in the office was really amusing, because all of them ended up sitting next to their challengers, haha. Except for Jeff and the Alyssa girl.

Ooh. 'Preppy'. Ouch.

Heheh, can't wait to see how they cope with this one ;D

Racer283 chapter 18 . 12/23/2010
Pretty good chapter can't wait to read the epilogue and see what happens in sequel when they go on their summer vacation if that is what the sequel is going to be about. Keep up the good work.
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