Reviews for Pyreflies |
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thefaultinourpatronus chapter 1 . 3/14/2011 Woah, nice ending! The opening had an equally punching kind of feel to it so good job with that! I think you should make this a chapter length story; you did a good job with the character emotions but I think you could delve deeper into them with a lengthier story! I've never really read about Sri Lankan culture so I think you did nicely with the descriptions of what they do, what they drink, etc. x mandy |
dx713 chapter 1 . 12/26/2010 Fine mood-setting piece. A lot of things to like inside. The first lines, with the divorce quote, is a good hook. Then, I like the description of the funeral attendance practical mood. That is so true, and not only in Sri-Lanka. I also like how you build the romance in small touches throughout the description. The description of the gossip amongst the elders is spot-on too. Kiddos to the main character for taking it that way, instead of being pissed-off. I would have been! I don't know how to interpret the end. I miss information on Sri-Lanka to know if being cousins is a problem for romance there or not. Then, I'm not sure how to interpret the pessimistic last sentence: is the companionship just about family ties or is it a sign there are going to be talks about Samar and Zarook amongst the elders? |
Xibalba Blooms chapter 1 . 12/22/2010 Without overdoing the descriptions, you've successfully immersed me in Sri Lankan culture. I felt like I was actually there for a moment, swallowing tea and Gulf heat, which was nice, because everything's covered in snow and ice over here. -_- '...and just the right amount of virtue a man doesn't know he's in need of.' - ha, loved that. The 'cousin' part was a nice twist. There are many elements in this that remind me of my own culture. It's inspired me to write something about it, though I don't think I'd know where to start. Anywho, thumbs up on this one. |
Dreamers-Requiem chapter 1 . 12/19/2010 A really nice short story - I liked the last line, it had a storng punch to it. A good twist with the 'cousin' thing as well, it could work as a romance but I like how, instead, they're related. I think you captured the feelings and emotions of the characters well, too. Great job. |