|Reviews for Luck|
| Ioga chapter 1 . 3/24/2011
Hi again. :) This one was brief and quickly past; I thought that the section swaps (which I actually didn't see while reading on my limited-fonts device O:)) made it kind of striped when looking at it on the full-blown browser.
My favourite part was was the start. It was even a bit of a shame that it wasn't really returned to (except the fire part). I thought the packing up and leaving was a strong statement of personality, and fascinating that way.
I don't know Chicago, so I was reading the references like an alien. I was furiously wondering, "I've heard of Sears Tower, so is that the right name after all?" _
Congrats on the contest success!
| this wild abyss chapter 1 . 2/21/2011
I wasn’t a particular fan of the way you switched back and forth between scenes. The scene about skipping school and the philosophical monologue didn’t seem to fit, and it was a little irritating to have things cut short.
The narrator you’ve presented here was nicely done, I thought. He or she had a clear, strong voice, and his or her thought processes followed a logical pattern that made things easy to follow, and his or her point was very much in evidence throughout this.
Review courtesy of Frac, who placed second in this month’s Review Marathon.
| Nesasio chapter 1 . 1/10/2011
This is so great. The first part hooked me in and the rest of the piece was fantastic. The brevity of each section works and the writing makes each bit feel profound. It all moves along quickly, without getting bogged down in unnecessary details but still giving a lovely glimpse of the narrator. The ending was also really strong. I've had that reaction to fault fire alarms too, haha, so I could relate to it. Overall, this is well-written and engaging. I really enjoyed it. Good luck in the WCC! :)
| Sercus Kaynine chapter 1 . 1/9/2011
I like how you focused on the luck aspect of the prompt here. You put it into a very thoughtful context. I also thought it was cool that we took a little walk around Chicago, since I know it's layout semi-well. Yes, I think that's the word for this piece: thoughtful.
Good job and good luck in WCC!
| lianoid chapter 1 . 1/7/2011
This is really strong piece, Sheriff. Your writing is amazing in this; the tone is brilliant, you used the scene breaks really well (normally they would be annoying but you didn't abuse them here; they worked brilliantly), and the pacing was perfect.
Everything about this is solid and I love how you tied the prompt in. You wove it into the narrative seamlessly, so that it was a part of the character as opposed to something just thrown in. Excellent stuff and best of luck in this month's WCC!
| Lil' DeiDei chapter 1 . 1/6/2011
That was intriguing. The contrast of the two, hmm, ideas? makes you wonder if the luck discussed doesn't hold out for the speaker, as there was a darker tone to that section of the story than for the speaker's current actions with regards to his/her walk. Interesting. )