I really, really liked this.

I liked the rhythm when I read it out loud, though I derailed on 'insubstantiality' - I'm sure I've never tried to say that word before.

I've read it five times now, and it gets better each time.

I even like the shape it traces on the page.

The thing I like best is the end, and I'm having trouble articulating why. I think it's the meter, the way it gets clipped at the end, it makes the message stronger - or maybe cleaner. It's like the last few ticks of a time bomb that doesn't go off.

Typos and Grammar:

[no errors that I could detect]

*Complements of the Review Game's Review Marathon. See my profile to find out more.