Oh good twist! I like how you descrived Mbiki's look as one of a parent and then you find out he really is her father! There are a couple of grammar mistakes: Mbiki says please let me help me, yet I don't think that's what you meant and Khensa took her hand, when it should be his hand. And I know you asked the question on the last post but I don't think the climax was too long nor too confusing!

Interesting that Bomani is there to protect her from whatever threat Mbiki is apparently bringing.

Well I CERTAINLY didn't expect him to be her father. Wow.

Pft. Bomani wouldn't actually kill her and while I know that, I guess Mbiki doesn't.

"After everything we've been through, still can't forgive me." - 'he still'

Bomani is so weird, but it's cute. :)

Just because it wasn't her biological mother who died, it was still her mother. Silly man, but at least it makes more sense now how he could just kill her.

"I offer her my hand, but no more." - 'him'

"Do you think you'll ever forgive you're father, Shana?" - 'your'

Aw I still really like Shana. :)

I can't wait to see what you have in store for us next. Jeez you're overdoing it with the random surprises (but not in a bad way). Keep up the great work and I can't wait for the next chapter!

OOh Khensa finds her father! Great chapter!

surprised a farro would die from childbirth, they seem so indestructible

and Khensa has sorta seen Bomani smile before in chapter 25 when he finds out that she has Jarai, though it's described as 'something like a smile' so I guess that doesn't count

I won't forgive Khensa because there is nothing to forgive. It's a natural reaction and that makes her more human. You really can't trust in a character that doesn't feel a thing. She is more belivable because she feels. Great chapter! Update soon!

Talk about coincidence. My husband is an aikido sensei. But he was never the tough guy... he was the guy that was always funny to everybody but deep inside always took things too seriously. It's nice when you know something about someone that nobody else knows.

Anyway... I like stubborn strong characters a lot. I like characters that don't take shit from anybody. Bomani is a bit like that.

Truly, I like Khensa. I think she's the sort of strong female that can keep up with such a strong character as Bomani. You are doing a truly great job here. Now I'm going to read the next chapter (I don't know how I'm missing so many updates lately... I guess carnival and listening podcasts about dungeons and dragons have been keeping me occupied).

I'd really like to know who her mother was. I'm really hoping it'll be in the next chapter.

you made a typo towards the end of the chapter. You wrote: ""Do you think you'll ever forgive you're father, Shana?" I ask carefully." - you needed to use 'your' instead of 'you're'

Can't wait for more ;)

Go Khensa Go! Save Junktown!

I know I've said it before like five times but I really really like how you describe things. The imagery and comparison are amusing and yet accurate and always grab my attention as something different and good from what I usually read.

"They kick up the sand as they surge northward, through the wall and away their beloved, burning town." - 'away from their'

Haha. Bomani scaring them out of the way... funny.

"They blanket the earth in a heap of limps and hair and fabric." - 'limbs'

"I look west, back towards Junktown, but see only the wall, backlight by the orange fire raging within its confines." - 'backlit'

Lol. Bomani arrives with a girl on each shoulder, what a pimp. lol. But at least he's strong enough to carry them both I suppose. Well maybe not. :)

"The front door of the house is open, figures our spilling out to join us in the rain." - 'are spilling out'

"Its obvious Lateef resents being spoken to like a five-year-old, but he's wise enough not to argue." - 'It's obvious'

"He's lies spread eagle upon the courtyard, uncaring of the torrential downpour soaking him." - 'He lies'

"I'll get them, Miss." Cook fleeting touches my shoulder." - 'fleetingly'

"The boy talks inexhaustibly of mundane things like horses and bathes and Bomani's stench, but it does little to distract from the emotions waiting to prey upon me." - 'baths'

Well I have certainly enjoyed this chapter. I do hope that Khensa gets over her guilt. I don't hold her accountable and I certainly don't think she should. And if Bomani does then I'll have to ask you to slap him really hard so you can knock some sense into him. I do find it quite interesting that Mbiki has come and I wonder how this will affect the outcome of the story. You always keep me guessing. Keep up the great work! And at least your husband knows he was an ass (and I'd assume he's improved since then so that's good too). P

/*Blood, mud, ask, sand, and pond sludge drip down my cheeks.*/ ash I assume?

/*"Uma-Umyama?"*/missed an 'a'

Great chapter! I have a terrible cold and this story is making me fell better. And you need all the help in feeling better when your cough medicine tastes like sewer water. Do you think you can bottle this story and make a Farro medicine? You'd make millions. hehehehehehe

Please update soon! ˆxˆ

Oh, goodness! Bomani is in love?

Yeah and fire. I'm going to read the next one!

Great chapter!

I hope she manages to make a hole/door in the wall, hopefully large enough to allow people through without the crush killing more. - I'd also love it if she managed to close it up after everyone has escaped, and trap the soldiers inside (despite how cruel that sounds it seems like one of the only ways of stopping the King, short of assassination).

I've voted in your poll but I would have liked to choose more than one option (so if you're looking at writing more than one, I'd like to read both option 1 and 2 :D )

Can't wait to read more ;)

Four more chapters? Ah, I don't want it to end! Well, actually I just want Bomani and Khensa to get together and live happily ever after. Also, I'm very excited for Bomani's P.O.V. Great chapter, again. Definitely looking forward for more.

Good for Bomani, going back for Umayama.

"He nods up at the rooftops, men and woman jump overhead like gazelle." - 'women'

"They press in, blinded by their panic to the danger they occasion me." - I'm just confused by what you mean here.

Somehow I didn't expect Khensa to fight the fire of course I also didn't expect it to be set by palace guards.

Funny that Bomani unintentionally stops her from what she meant to do, but at least he stuck around to save her. :)

I really do love the way you describe things some times, funny and yet effective.

I am glad you didn't kill off Khensa, that'd be one heck of a twist. lol. I'm quite excited about what could happen next, but every time I think I might have figured it out, you completely blow my mind. So keep up the great work!

/*He took them into the dessert and hurt them.*/ dessert... yum

Though my favorite character... hmm... I do like Khensa though I wouldn't call her my favorite. My favorite may be Bomani