|Reviews for Nameless|
| berley chapter 1 . 2/20/2011
“logical; and perhaps sometimes made too much sense for our own good.”
- I’m not sure if a semi-colon is the right punctuation here since you have ’and’ in there. But then again, I’m not the greatest with semi-colons. Haha!
“Nalia; and I began prepare for the robot apocalypse as Teak greased his gears of flirtation.”
- Again, improper use of a semi-colon, and you’re missing a word in that sentence. Typo.
I noticed a few fragmented sentences throughout the piece, but I think with the informal tone of the narration it works. I liked the narration the best, it really helped give the narrator a sense of character and made me want to learn more about what was going on. Very original idea for plot so far, I’m looking forward to hearing more about this ’essence swapping.’